2KPOP16: SOTY Rate (THE FINAL: ~*WINNER*~) | Page 31 | The Popjustice Forum

2KPOP16: SOTY Rate (THE FINAL: ~*WINNER*~)

Discussion in 'K-pop' started by Squashua, Dec 4, 2016.



  1. WE'VE GOT THREE MALE SONGS LEFT


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    WE'VE GOT THREE ALBUM TRACKS LEFT



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    WHICH ONE IS DOWN TO TWO?
    Reverse Spice Girls Moment





























    34th

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    AOA - 10 SECONDS
    Avg: 7.50

    10s - @Aries @Vesperly @D is for Danger! @Lego
    3s - @Robinho#1 @Laurence Nope
    My Score: 9



    Slap BANG on a 7.5 score, a commendable 3 & 3/4 stars on the celestial scale, is the AOA single that never was. ICONIQUE @ this beating out the actual single from the 2K16 Baywatch era by 22 places and over a point on averages. The real winner of Good Luck EP is:

    BODY ROLL PLEASE

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    10 SECONDS



    In my earlier narration of Rainbow's Whoo, I made reference to the 80's influenced K-Pop family that came to a position of power over our eardrums last year (all of which are still standing strong). Well I kinda forgot to include this distant cousin from the Miami boulevard who takes aerobics classes for wealthy mob boss wives' by day, and may or may not be the most ferociously sexy go-go dancer on the strip...

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    WE DAH PWETTY GURLS HEY HEY *SQUAWK*

    But wait, there's literally none of that sprite's squeaky shenanigans in this one, just an velvet warm, midnight drive around the bay whilst angelic voices lap your ears like waves on the shore. It's a bit weird in that it really doesn't represent any of the staples of an AOA track. Jimin gets no time to be real top madam with numerous ad-libs, Choa is a smidgen more restrained rather than belting everywhere, Yuna-Seolhyun-Hyejeong get the lion's share of the lines and there's no kitchen sink production nor a job-themed sexy outfit concept. What could that have been? Sexy watch-makers? Sexy Clock-women?


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    Ok poor Mina & Chanmi getting less than 10 seconds of singing time between them in the song as per always but you can't win them all...

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    It's just glossy. Silky. It's not bash you in the face 80's nor is it boring for a mid-tempo-ey ballad thing. In some respects I think they took this as their template for Excuse Me at the start of this year and ran with it. IMAGINE if this had been the lead single followed by Excuse Me - maybe we'd all be stanning for them then. As it is, this song has been left in the kick-up of west coast sand with only Music Show live performances of them straddling couches seductively in the mist for us to remember it by.

    I'M CHOKED

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    **********

    What only takes 10 seconds?

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    It takes less than 10 seconds to realise Robinho#1 is about to continue his villain strike: "Unfamiliar with this era and quite frankly AOA with Brave Brothers is a massive disappointment."

    But Heart Attack?
    But Miniskirt?
    But Like a Cat?
    But Excuse Me??


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    It only takes 10 seconds for many of you to make BIG claims i.e. when's the mess that would be the AOA rate? Reboot has passed the glorious honeymoon period now Excuse Me is here: "One of their best ever songs. I love it a little less now that their new album is out, though." Ajmkv got swayed by the other pretty things on offer: "I liked it, but somehow it didn't end up convincing me as much as the other stellar album tracks (Crazy Boy and Cherry Pop.) Still, this is AOA at their best." and Ryan_Riot is all about the non-chunky preserves: "One of my favorite AOA tracks ever! It’s like a ballad but with a smooth jam retro quality to it. I love it!"

    As much as Choa loves the smoke?
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    It only takes 10 Seconds for y'all to realise the error of your ways and discover an 80's stealth bomb. ThighHighs saw his Cherry Pop (avaliable on the Good Luck EP): "I’m hearing so many songs for the first time in this rate, and this is one of my favorites! I love the 80s production so much. That pre-chorus is SO good." Also part of the exploration team, Dr GeiPanda has made a startling observation: "Really soothing! A nice discovery." Oui it was for me too. Slice of JYP is here to compare this to the masterclass of 80's inspired K-Pop albums: "Okay, now I see why y'all hated Good Luck. It's because 10 Seconds is soooo good. It has a Wonder Girls song quality to it which means it's pop perfection. It sounds lush and expensive and emotive and sexy. I hate myself for only listening to this now. Ugh."

    LET IT WASH AWAY YOUR SINS UNNIE
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    It only takes 10 seconds for D is for Danger! to admit his night time gig: "This should have been the lead single. It fit way better with the 80s concept and Baywatch look. It's sleek, sexy and effortless. No lie, but I would give a lap dance to this song if I didn't move like a robot. Jimin's xanaxed-out rap leading into Choa/Yuna vocals and that oh so sexy synth is the highlight of the track for me."

    #JusticeForXanaxed-outRoboLapDancing

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    Finally, it only takes 10 Seconds for McQueer to give us the definitive breakdown on all the highlights: "I love those backing vocals in the second pre-chorus, Jimin isn't annoying as shit on this one and of course that instrumental bit after the middle 8 gave me chills, Kylie's “All The Lovers” teas. Poor Chanmi and Mina tho, don't even get to sing on AOA's best song :( "

    #JusticeForNoLineUnnies

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  2. I still stand by what I wrote in my commentary. 10 Seconds is an absolutely gorgeous track, but I feel like they really outdid themselves with the general quality on Angel's Knock so I don't really need the song anymore. I wouldn't mind if they did more songs like it, though.
     
    Cotton Park, Squashua and ajmkv like this.
  3. Okay but To The Beautiful You should've left before these two.
     
    Salami likes this.
  4. BLASPHEMY!
     
  5. Yeah, I agree.
     
    ajmkv and Dangerous Maknae like this.
  6. I agree too but i was afraid to call for this one.
     
  7. "To the Beautiful You" should be in the top 10...
     
    ajmkv likes this.
  8. It should have been their farewell single. Much better than Draw Me.
     
    Squashua, ryan_riot92 and ajmkv like this.
  9. Actually, now that you say it, it really should have been. Draw Me was good, but To The Beautiful You is lush.
     

  10. You also forgot to include another 2016 SMASH that I won't mention just yet, for fear of jinxing it out of this rate.
     
    Squashua likes this.
  11. Wrong.

    Correct.
     
    ryan_riot92 and Squashua like this.
  12. oops at me only replying to this...

    SARANGHAE, @junglefish UNNIE!!! How long will our relationship last though? kii.

    I feel the same way, teebs. Like, I'm seeing everyone of you in a whole different light. Some of your commentaries and your posts in this thread... you're hurting me, mawmas. You're hurting my fragile heart.
     
    ajmkv, junglefish and Squashua like this.
  13. Remember when we were close in rates ?! Now I've grown up enough in K-pop to go my own way , hehe.


    At this point i regret some of my scores. Aside from underscoring Brave Girls and Stellar songs , i think i was too generous with GFriend. I mean , I gave Navillera a 10 but i won't be mad if it leaves soon.
     
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2017
    ajmkv likes this.
  14. And that's a problem?! It isn't.
     
    Slice of Life and junglefish like this.
  15. Ok I know all these tracks have actually pretty good average scores but still, what the fuck.
     

  16. WHILST THE DISCUSSION WAS GETTING HEATED







    KOREA'S FAVE JUST GOT KNOCKED OUT











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    33rd

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    TWICE - CHIRRUPP
    Avg: 7.53

    10s - @GeiPanda @Aries @ryan_riot92 @Capitan @Reboot @ajmkv
    2 - @Deja-Boo
    My Score: 7.5



    Can we get anymore cutthroat than punching out the Nation's Sweethearts with their TWO MILLION selling single and 2016 Record of the Year Daesang snatcher?

    #FUK-DA-MAMA-AWARDS

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    If you were wondering why I didn't post yesterday it's in part (but not really kii, life's a mess) because there's very little way I can do the impact of this song on the Korean consciousness justice. Like Ooh-Aah never disappeared, long after the zombie video had long past the Halloween release date, and we just weren't ready.

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    The next single arrived with cryptic teasers perhaps promising something wildly different but fear not lovers of the mainstream:

    LADIES AND UNNIES AND OPPAS,

    THE COSPLAY INVASION HAS ARRIVED




    It's a mess with a capital WTF. There's no bone-picking about it - this is everything, the kitchen sink and your neighbour's garage sale contained in a single song+visual. Some days I love it for that, sometimes I'm deafened by the immense racket of poor sweet Jihyo warbling through that chorus. The vaguely reggaeton Tzuyu - Sana - Momo - Jeongyeon pre-chorus (form a sub-unit divas!) is far and away the best thing about all of this, perhaps along with Momo threatening to shoot you in the face during the video,

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    and I always get ramped up for that section. The rest? Keep it. The video? It was a cool concept for a cinemaphile like me at the time but they've done cosplay enough at this point. I've got TT now, I had Like Ooh-Aah before. I can live without, i'm all grown up, I've got a bowl cut now.

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    TWICE'S SUPERPOWER OF SHOOK UP

    Who cares if the song is messy, many consider the band overhyped and the visual/song concepts vaguely borrow from Oh! and OC's song of our generation Shanghai Romance? We all need a hero to shake us up once in a while...

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    Mina's confused face - cackle

    Watch as the multicultural hunties of the world shake their tooshes to it on various sports fields and do a better job than Twice



    Gasp as the classical crowd get their lives in the completely wrong set location and do a better job than Twice.



    Cheer as OMG's Seunghee uses the song as a force of good and scalps all the other nugu girl-groups with her own Smells Like Twice Spirit and does a better than Twice



    and Cackle as TWICE's crowning moment at the MAMAs is taken in by a highly unamused EXO i'm not sure if TWICE are good at scowling so EXO might not do that better.



    HOW PRESSED
    HOW SHOOK


    NOW BABY CHURRRUPPPPPP

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    Yes this is a move we call "the reach".



    **********

    It's quiz time Unnies!

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    Which Member of TWICE would you be if TWICE = KPJ?

    Because really Twice are the Korean kweens of #relatable and reflect all of us in some way or form. PS i'm Mina which is acceptable - foreign line or bust.

    Robinho#1 is happy with my quiz selection process: "The foreign line is the only saving grace. They stay getting the pre-chorus or catchy bits." which is the absolute truth in this song's case. I'm CHURRUPED that people like Like Ooh-Aah! as much as I do-Aah! Take
    Vesperly for one: "The poor man's Like Ooh-Ahh... In the spiritually poor sense, since JYP is obviously rolling in sweet, sweet won." The sweetest won (yet he still be knocking at young girls' doors in his pjs).

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    Over in the "Unable to be CHURRUPED" Interior Delusions Lounge, is really Bad Madam McQueer: "Chaeyoung and Dahyun have to be some of the worst “rappers” ever..." which kickstarted an absolute feud under the shade tree, Deja-Boo dishing out the first blow:
    "[​IMG] "

    Ajmkv ain't jokin' binch, at all: "I love this. Straight up (churrup?). Unapologetically. And if you say something bad about this song....
    [​IMG]"


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    Dismissive of the in-band violence (I mean it's like T-ara up in here!) ThighHighs has some rhetoricals for y'all: "This song. Do I bop to it? Every time. Does that mean I enjoy it and am going to give it a high score? Nope." and just goddamn worn out by all the hollering is Salami: "God damn Twice always wear me down. If the chorus was better, this could've been a 10"

    Out on the main stage, who needs vocal abilities when you have Slice of Swaying Opinions to defend your dulcet tones: "This is the Twice song that took me the longest to really like. Thank God the music video is so iconic so even if the music sucked, I would've watched the video a million times anyway. Maybe this is weird, but my favourite bits on every Twice single are Sana and Momo's parts. I know they can't sing to save their lives but I truly like their voices ddddddd. And I hate Jungyeon's vocals dddddddddddd x 2. I still hate that they can't properly pronounce 'cheer' and the dance breakdown is nowhere near as iconic as Like Ooh Ahh's. I hope the new single will be better than this." You're not the only confused one cyst, D is for Danger! still has questions: "A massive hit in Korea. It's definitely lost some of its charm after all these months I still can't figure out what they're singing in the chorus. Shut up baby? Churro baby? Chorrop baby? It definitely doesn't sound like Cheer up. It's a mess musically, but it somehow works."

    LATIN CROSS-OVER HIT?

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    Read you, Wrote you - it's ya gal Reboot: "Already more iconic than all your faves’ songs." Well asides from the next 32 songs but who's counting? Certainly not Ryan_Riot, he's living his seasonal fantasies out in the CHURRP mist: "Whenever this song comes on, I think of summer weather. It also reminds me of running with my dog in the spring time but that’s because it was on repeat half of the time. It’s an amazing track! Not as catchy or impactful as “Like Ooh-Ahh” but it was definitely not a sophomore slump! Praise Shaman Unnie to whomever made the Greasy Version too!"

    I think i've maxed out my embedded video quota for this post so you'll just have to trek to Youtube to watch the Grease Up

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    Bidding an annyeong to the CHURRUP team, GeiPanda is dragging y'all follicle by follicle, tag by tag (but i'm also offended he didn't mention the song in his profile picture's influence): "I know y'all don't understand Twice's appeal - and to be honest, I'm not a blind stan of them either. But I honestly think they have pretty unique songs. People like @junglefish need to take a break from taking instagram selfies of their cute hairy faces and appreciate shyshyshy."

    SHA-SHA-SHA

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  17. [​IMG]

    bye!!!

    love you hairy bae @junglefish
     
  18. Grease Up >>>>> Cheer Up.

    Y'all better not shite on TT though...
     
    D is for Danger! and ajmkv like this.
  19. I still live and breathe for this:

     
    McQueer, Capitan and D is for Danger! like this.
  20. [​IMG]
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    (but thanks for the plug BINCH, follow me ya'll #instagay #instaboy #gayboy)

    Now, about TWICE... I honestly don't even hate them anymore. TT is a certified bop and I grew to enjoy Like Ooh Aah. Knock Knock is great but I got bored of it after two days. Cheer up, on the other hand, is just crap and should have left way sooner. I wanted to give it a lower score but I didn't have time to write commentary N N N N N N. In my heart it's a 3 at best.
     
    GeiPanda, ryan_riot92, ajmkv and 2 others like this.
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