Inland Empire
Staff member
he/she/they
Dating & Relationships
- Thread starter Babylon
- Start date
So last night I went out with my boyfriend and as I was walking him home it got quite cold. He gave me his jacket and I went to my place all warm and ready to bury myself in bed.
I get home and out of curiosity I start checking the pockets of that jacket. Just me being nosy and having watched way too many movies I was anxious to find a secret note from a lover or something. Luckily for him there was no note, but I felt something hard in one of the pockets, like a tiny stone. I take it out, look at it and... IT WAS HIS FUCKING TOOTH! Turns out he carries it with him as a fucking lucky charm............
I get home and out of curiosity I start checking the pockets of that jacket. Just me being nosy and having watched way too many movies I was anxious to find a secret note from a lover or something. Luckily for him there was no note, but I felt something hard in one of the pockets, like a tiny stone. I take it out, look at it and... IT WAS HIS FUCKING TOOTH! Turns out he carries it with him as a fucking lucky charm............
The way this is way worse than cheating nn
I watch too much True Crime, but are you sure it's his tooth?!
I would marry him.
londonrain
Staff member
That’s a more accurate depiction of autistic-allistic flirting dddd.How it feels trying to do autism-to-autism flirting
If the two autistic people are self-aware enough (and that’s a big if for white English people!) at least there’s potential for directness without feeling like you’ve broken some unspoken social rule ddd.
I find this to be really sweet.
Wait...
His sweet tooth.
Inland Empire
Staff member
he/she/they
no tooth fairy, whipped cream, no dairy
What happened with the girl?
Inland Empire
Staff member
he/she/they
We’ve been talking about our respective digestive health problems (chronic indigestion for me, constipation of some sort for her)
He/They
Surprised I've gone 2 months without an update, but I feel like the love life has gone slightly more on my back burner this year. Hookups have remained as fruitful as always, which we love, but most of which aren't interesting enough to document here. Had a lovely session with a guy in Nashville during a work trip last month, and had a uniquely jam-packed day while in New York City last week (3 separate men in my hotel room in a 6-hour span, oh my). Mr. Cowboy has been a fun new roster add - we love a man who will carry you to their bedroom - but even that isn't much of a storied dalliance.
To update on previous suitors, I'll start with Mr. Left His Number, who went radio silent for the month following my last post. He then popped up again, asking if I wanted to go to a monthly gay dance party with him, doing cocktails at mine first. We ended up grabbing dinner before doing the other things and it was a nice evening to catch up, but everything about it felt weirdly platonic on his end. He invited to join him at a house party the following weekend, but it ended up feeling like New Year's Eve all over again. We started off very flirty and touchy, but it wasn't long before he went off to do the same with numerous other guys, leaving me to my own devices. It again felt like I was competing to be his end-of-the-night prize, which I didn't have the energy for, so I let him know I would be heading home. He thanked me for coming the next day and I Iaid out my confusion about our situationship in text. I told him about my frustration being invited to these environments where I'm left feeling like one of many options for him, how he had told me that he wanted to continue doing what we'd been doing while his actions have said the opposite, and reiterated that I'd like to keep our friends with benefits dynamic going but am unsure how given his changed behavior. He apologized for the confusion, made it clear he wants nothing more than a platonic friendship, said he thought he had made that clear last year, and that he'd like to keep inviting me to things. I told him I'm not sure that's something I currently want, but that I would let him know if things change. I'm proud of myself for setting a boundary for once because it would be too easy for me to be my usual yearning self and just follow him around, hoping he'll change his mind. Instead, I have not spoken to him since and am actively trying to forget how hot he is and how good the sex was.
As for Mr. Doorman, I think we've finally settled into a good place. We still communicate on a near-daily basis, but we only hang out every few weeks and I'm now just happy to have his friendship, letting his boyfriend and boy toy deal with this Manic Pixie Dreamboy tendencies.
I had a random run-in with Mr. Too Good To Be True at a bar last month, where I drunkenly confronted him for presenting himself as one thing and making promises to me before completely ghosting me. He apologized and explained he got scared because he felt something, and I made the foolish decision to go back to his place and hook up with him again. I told him if that's all it is, that's cool, but to be clear about it. He once again said he thinks we have a special connection, how he knows the ball is in his court, and how he wants to keep hanging. He even exchanged socks with me as some weird incentive to see me again. Needless to say... he's gone right back to ghostville, but at least I know better than to expect anything more at this point, and have moved beyond feeling any type of way about it. He also gave me some fun health consequences I spent the following weeks dealing with, so a real cool dude.
Against my better judgement, Mr. Messages is still firmly planted in my DMs. Our pseudo-love triangle is over as our mutual friend (the previously written about Mr. New In Town) had the intelligence to bow out once we found out Mr. Messages had played us both by getting a boyfriend while telling each of us he wasn't in the headspace to date. Well he has continued messaging me in the ensuing months, and I continue giving in as I really enjoy it. I've finally knocked the fantasy that we'll ever grow beyond that, but even that little daily validation is really nice.
There have been two new entrants on the dating front, one of whom I went on a fantastic first date with last week after meeting on the dance floor of a gay bar. I'm trying to be more judicious about my pseudonyms, so I'll refrain from labeling until after date 2, but I'm stoked to spend more time with him. The other is Mr. Nice Guy, if only because he's the nicest person I've ever dated. We've had 6 dates since first meeting on Grindr last month, and he's a genuine sweetheart. Handsome, tall, respectable age, good job, nice apartment, decent car, good at sex, close with his family, always very eager to hang out, constantly supporting my work, daily text check-ins, always happy to tell me how much he misses me... but something is missing for me. Like everything sounds great, and looks great on paper, but I feel like he's missing a certain... edge, for lack of a better term. I recognize it appears I'm self-sabotaging because I'd rather go for the jerks I'm used to, or am bored by the fact that I'm doing none of the chasing. But I really don't think that's it - I enjoy hanging out with him, and want to see where this goes, but I think a long-term partner for me looks like something more in the middle of these guys. There's no banter, no rapport, no definable spark... but he's so kind to me, and that's really nice.
We will see where things go, but considering there's been no progress with my Hinge/Tinder bans,I'm just happy it hasn't gone entirely dormant. In fact, maybe I've even found more of a work/love/life balance.
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I'm going to kill you if you let the fact that this man doesn't deregulate your nervous system stop you from finding something true and good, @lushLuck
I will not. As mentioned, I am giving this guy a fair shot because he seems to check off all the boxes of someone I should be with. I still can't help but feel like something is lacking - chemistry, a spark... I'm not sure - but I'm not letting that stop me from exploring this.
Delete his number and block him on grindr. If he's interested he will message you otherwise you're just wasting your time.
As I erased another guy from my online existence, I couldn’t help but wonder: am I just too uncool for dating apps?
Whereas most men treat dating apps like an all-you-can-eat buffet, where it doesn’t matter if you treat a guy like shit because there is a seemingly endless supply of other men to take his place, I am the opposite. Yes, the limit seemingly does not exist on the apps, but how many of those men are actually worth your while? So when I find someone I hit it off with, I naively (?) want to cherish that connection rather than take it for granted, because those encounters are so far and few between.
Anyway. Let me take a break from it all and touch some grass.
Whereas most men treat dating apps like an all-you-can-eat buffet, where it doesn’t matter if you treat a guy like shit because there is a seemingly endless supply of other men to take his place, I am the opposite. Yes, the limit seemingly does not exist on the apps, but how many of those men are actually worth your while? So when I find someone I hit it off with, I naively (?) want to cherish that connection rather than take it for granted, because those encounters are so far and few between.
Anyway. Let me take a break from it all and touch some grass.