I am truly heartbroken. Ever since we heard the news last year Sarah has been on my mind. Girls Aloud are the girl band of my life, and Sarah has always been my favourite one. Listening to the Spice Girls is one of the earliest memories of my life, and they are the blueprint of girl bands however Girls Aloud hold a special place in my heart because I was around 14/13 years old when I met them and it was super radom: it was back in 2005 and I was awake on a Saturday morning which was(is) rare, I'm from Argentina so clearly they virtually unknown here, but there was this TV channel that played Top of the Pops for some random reason and I saw them performing Wake Me Up and I was like "who the F are these ladies? they're killing it". I did not have internet back then (you had to be wealthy to have internet connection at home in 2005 in a third world country) but I saved their names in my brain "g i r l s - a l o u d". You see, they were super important to me because they, along with Madonna during COADF era, re-introduced me to Pop music, I was always a hardcore fan of Pop music but when I started highschool I was bullied so badly for being a Britney and Xtina fan (pop music was heavily looked down on and it kinda still is in Argentina) that I simply stopped listening to them for a year or two (I literally have no idea what I listened to between the ages of 11/12 to 14) because I was just so ashamed of being gay and listening to pop music. However, when I met these girls (and M with COADF) I said "f*ck it. this is the music I love". Then, a couple of years later, I finally got internet at home and I started participating in a Spanish pop forum and they had different threads and one of them was for GirlsAloud and I simply fell in love, this was around the time of SKO and the first GH. Girls Aloud and Xenomania taught me so much about pop music and how it has no boundaries if you don't want it to, they taught me and introduced me to EuroPop, in a place where the only pop I was in contact with was the more American/Urban pop from the mid 00s (which I love as well of course). Sarah was always my favourite 'cause she just seemed to be enjoying herself so much, especially live. She was this loud, happy, smiling and always laughing woman, who was always giving her 100% and having the best times. She was always a little bit extra and I loved that because I was the same, and growing up in a small, super conservative/catholic city in a third world country was not easy at all, and so I needed people like Sarah to look up to. In 2012 I decided to move to Buenos Aires so I started saving lots of money for that, and then the girls announced their reunion and the Ten Tour. I found myself in quite a dilemma, I was willing to spend all the money I had saved to move to BsAs (what is: find a place to rent and live off my savings until I got a job) on a one-weekend long trip to London just to see the girls perform. I remember telling my BFF "I just feel as if this is going to be their last tour". People tried to talk me out of it saying that it was crazy, but I was like "they're my favourite band ever". Long story short, I was actually talked out of the idea, I figured "well, there's surely going to be a 20th-year anniversary tour, and I'm gonna be there". Imagine how I felt after the last date of the Ten Tour came to an end and we got that horrible TW post... I just can't believe Sarah is going through this and in such a short time-lapse! IT is so hard and difficult to process. It saddens me so much. I am just glad that the girls were able to move on from the drama and see what is important: that they had a dream, that they succeeded, that they touched so many people's hearts, that they are a group, a band, that they re-shaped pop music and gave us timeless bops and that at the end of the day they can move on from the drama, even if the circumstances are...well... This weekend I cried so much reading the news and the interviews, I just wish Sarah can have happy days and that she's able to have the meeting she talked about with her friends and dance on tables and have the best time ever. I'm sure she's getting all of our love and feels accompanied. And we, the fans, we have each other to support in these difficult times, we have their music and we have their memories. Sorry for the long post but I am just able to write about this now and I needed to get it out of me.