londonrain
Staff member
Random pop fact: he used to date George Shelley from Union J.Just caught up on all this. Hello Matty what a attractive man, true bombshell introduction

Random pop fact: he used to date George Shelley from Union J.Just caught up on all this. Hello Matty what a attractive man, true bombshell introduction
What is Ben even doing on the show? He literally sucks the life of an episode the moment the camera focuses on him.
But having an avoidant attachment style isn’t an excuse. In fact it’s quite a toxic personality trait and it will damage Ben in the long run.
Vitor is displaying classic anxious behaviour because he wants reassurance from Ben that the attraction is still there and Ben is showing classic avoidant behaviour because he feels stifled the moment someone actually shows proper interest in him.
(See also: his reaction to Ross saying he fancied him.)
With Vitor it’s a mask for the fact he thinks his value lies in the fact people want to fuck him, so he leans hard into that because he thinks he’ll get the affection he wants if he gives people what he thinks they want, which is to fuck him.
With Ben it’s a mask for the fact he’s got impostor syndrome about having multiple people fancy him, but also he struggles to figure out what HE actually wants and what level of attention he wants in a relationship. So when he gets in a match he gets an initial rush of new relationship energy but he doesn’t know how to sustain it because he can’t ask for what he needs if he doesn’t know what he needs. He’s severely emotionally closed off because for whatever reason he hasn’t found that being vulnerable is a good thing for him.
Vitor actually did come around to being able to just articulate what he needed, and Ben reacted badly to it.
This is basically a masterclass in the avoidant/anxious tango and it deserves to be raised in therapy sessions across the country. The more Ben pulls away, the more Vitor thinks “if only I changed X or Y he’d like me” and gets more desperate for Ben’s attention, and the more Vitor tries to get Ben’s attention, the more Ben gets scared and pulls away.
Ben thought Ollie wasn’t doing enough chasing. Now he thinks Vitor is doing too much chasing. The truth is that nobody will ever do the right amount of chasing for him because he will always start losing interest once he feels either that the other guy is not interested enough or that the other guy is too interested. It’s self-sabotaging.
Basically, earth to Vitor on the subject of Ben:
No, I've just had a lot of therapy dddd.This is so spot on. Do you do this for a living?
I can’t at Ben changing his behaviour towards Vitor literally after turning around and kissing him. He just doesn’t come across as a nice person at all.
Also how is there 2 new episodes already? I checked BBC iPlayer all of last week and there were only 4 episodes and today there’s 6?
They’ve been adding two episodes at a time every Sunday.I can’t at Ben changing his behaviour towards Vitor literally after turning around and kissing him. He just doesn’t come across as a nice person at all.
Also how is there 2 new episodes already? I checked BBC iPlayer all of last week and there were only 4 episodes and today there’s 6?
And it sounded like they were really reaching to find drama for Kailum and Jake to justify their screen time.Not too sure about this upcoming twist. Think producers need to realise we need a bit of light with the shade - constant drama is jarring. Gareth and Subomi have essentially been edited out unless they're giving advice, and I'm sure they don't just sit in silence the rest of the time.
I’m worried Matty will pick Ben and Jake W will be out with barely any time in the masseria.It's a shame there are only 2 episodes left, it feels like it's just heating up. I'm really liking Matty and Jake W. Hopefully a second season might be longer.
My vote goes to Gareth & Subomi!I’m worried Matty will pick Ben and Jake W will be out with barely any time in the masseria.
At this point it must be between Dan/Ollie, Gareth/Subomi and Kailum/Jake to ‘win’ the final episode. I’m not seeing it for Ross/Ceejay or Matty/Ben, and Jake W and Vitor look like they’re on the way out.