I Think I'm Gonna Win This Time: The One Direction Discography Rate

I will be amazed if they provide more interesting results than this group has so far. Oh wait, it's going to be Story of My Life, Perfect, or Night Changes. Bookmark me.

 

What am I going to do without my audience?

 

I do have a Tegan & Sara rate in the queue, but I don't think it's going to happen for at least six months minimum.

 

I may still do Arcade Fire! Or perhaps a Canadian indie rock versus!

I like both of those albums.

 

Do you know what indie means?

 

I'm not at the bottom of the queue....

Stars, Broken Social Scene, others from the Montreal music scene, etc

 

It's not looking that good for a post tonight either, I'm having one of my migraine episodes. We'll see.

 

Yes, I've a brief respite from my nausea, so let's do this!!!
















I have so many questions for you all.




















SO MANY.


























Today's an easy one though.






















Do you remember summer '09?

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#14. Rock Me [8.047]

High Score: 11 x 1 (@Subwaykid), 10 x 6 (@constantino, @CorgiCorgiCorgi, @First2Run, @KAG, @ohnostalgia, @Posh Spears)
Low Score: 2.5 x 1 @Fever)


This is glorious. I truly feel sorry for the haters as they probably have no joy in their lives. The seventh track from Take Me Home, Rock Me perfectly marries pop and rock, culminating in a perfect summation of the boys early sound. There's so much to love about this one. Let's start with the clapping Queen-esque beat that pulses throughout the entire song. LOVE IT. I especially love how its paired with acoustic guitars until a more heavy handed electric sound comes in during the chorus. 100% more interesting and effective that way. There are no lowlights in this song- l absolutely adore the phrasing on the verses and the prechorus (the sea part is superb). The chorus oh my god, I could live in the HIT THE PETAL HEAVY METAL SHOW ME YOU CAAAAAAAAAAAARE section forever. Don't even get me started on the spelling bee during the bridge. That's such a singalong moment of pop rock brilliance and I'm so happy every time this song comes on. Harry is wonderful here, Zayn's got some killer adlibs, and Liam kills me every time on his verse. Rock Me is just so much fun. Even though I spent Summer '09 toiling away at the Wal-Mart garden centre, I cannot listen to this without smiling. Shame about that Dr. Luke bit.


Who's ready to rock?????


I'm going to trap @Fever (2.5) in a room with this song until he repents. That score is blasphemous. Oh look it's the Queen of Hatred and Louis's Wife @GhettoPrincess (5). Shocker. I better not forget @Mr. Right (5.5), who certainly does not live up to his username (this will become even more relevant down the road, sob).


Do you like anything? Serious question. @VivaForever (4)- "I was struggling to find something positive to say about this but then it got to ‘R-O-C-K me again’ which frankly slays a bit."


@eccentricsimply (5)- "They aren't even trying, really." Didn't stop you giving Illusion a 10 though!


@A$AP Robbie (5)- "Not Dr Luke's finest moment (but also not his worst crime, its probably fair to say." I've blocked his involvement with this song from my mind.


As for our six scorers, I continuously laugh at how @Sprockrooster (6) underscores his fave's better moments. Puh-leese. I'm not surprised to see @Txetxu (6) here either. Those were the only scores under 7 folks. Pretty damn impressive.


@Up Down Suite (7) calls it- "The definition of a 7." I do not think so.


@Animalia (8) is creating ha dating profile right now! "You want me to what you now, lads? A'ight. I won't complain."


@Furball (8)- "I love it dearly, but on the other hand Dr. Luke." Sigh.


@Macsun (9) is throwing out some Nouis praise- "An example of what a good vocal production can do with Louis' voice. The rare instance where he sounds good in a song. Another rarity is Niall leading a chorus. A+" I didn't even notice that until you pointed it out, so good job Niall!


@DJHazey (9) callously reminds us of Haircutgate 2K16- "They put the "we're a rock band" act on with this chorus. It even opens up with the signature "We Will Rock You" stomp, in case anyone forgot what the song's title was. I was ready to dismiss this at first, but I guess Harry's haircut was built for head-banging…"


I_CANNOT_USE_REAL_WORDS_PROPERLY_ @KAG (9.5)- "You can literally hear the robotic tinge of autotune on Louis' voice on this, but I suppose that is preferable to hearing his real voice. Anyway, the production of this goes awffff. The live version is great too."


Do you remember fall 2015? @SophiaSophia (9.5) does! "It's annoying to know what their actually capable of and then weep at what they've become."


@sexercise (9.5) says what I've always thought- "Weren’t they like 12 in Summer ’09? Mess. Still amazing."


@wackseed (9.5) has an interesting idea of subtle- "I love this song so much?? I love the subtle callback to We Will Rock You and I love the chorus and I love the romanticism of it, even though it's silly. Really what I love most is whenever Zayn sang it live and hit those lovely high notes. "


GIVE IN @First2Run (10)!!!! "Every fiber of my being is telling me to dislike this song but I can’t! It will R.O.C.K. me again and again."


Will you all give poor @CorgiCorgiCorgi (10) a break? "Louis's distinctive voice actually works well here! Great song, no weak parts, it's a perfect 10 from me. Best part is that "I want you to hit the pedal, heavy metal, show me you care" bit in the chorus."


@Posh Spears (10) lays down some truths- "Everyone knows that this would have been their biggest song if they released it as a single. I don’t really know why their management and record label chose to miss out on a lot of money and success by not properly releasing this? A fanmade lyric video for this song is their most viewed non-vevo video on YouTube with 94+ million views! Talk about iconic."


I've been enjoying these moments when @constantino (10) just gives in and starts stanning! "This is SO cheap and SO tacky but the chorus is fucking addictive, right to the subtle little guitar riff…it just knocks. Like, I can’t believe how much I enjoyed listening to this song. Rock Me? More like SHOCK ME! Ha! I’ll see myself out…"

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Tomorrow: another day another slae(ed) 11.

 

I would also like to formally state that Where Do Broken Hearts Go needed to get the hell out of here before the Top 25. WHAT ARE YOU ALL DOING?