It's Britney Bitch! The Britney Spears Rate - WINNER!!!

You're introducing someone to Britney for the first time. Which album do you play for them?

  • Total voters
    233
Holly Something

Holly Something

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But which one...

















Ana Raquel said:
The world (me) is begging for my zero!
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148th Place
Private Show
(from Glory)

Average: 5.531

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High Scorer: 10 x 1 (@lilylu)
Low Scorers: 0 x 4 (@theincredibleflipper, @Ana Raquel, @Mushroom, @M24)
My Score: 8.5

Private Show appears as track 4 on the Glory album. It was written by Britney with Carla Marie Williams, Tramaine Winfrey and Simon Smith, being produced by Winfrey (vocal production by Thomas Mischke). The song was released as a promotional single for the album, and was also chosen as the name of her latest fragrance at the time, even getting its own TV commercial featuring the song:



My thoughts: I've always really liked this, I don't really understand the bad reputation it has. It's not her best recorded vocal ever but she sounds like she's having a fucking blast singing it and I love that for her. I also think it's funny that Britney and Little Mix released albums called Glory/Glory Days so close together, both featuring a song called Private Show!
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@JMRGBY (7) I know this is gonna get crucified in the comments but I think this is so quintessentially Britney. She just sounds like she had so much fun singing this. She really does doesn't she?

@boombazookajoe (3) I don't think it's particularly controversial to say that Britney is certainly not the best vocalist in the game, even if I would argue that she has one of the most distinct and IMPORTANT voices in pop music in the last 30 years. Anyway, that's all to say, that few songs do I really think "Wow, she sounds AWFUL here" but this is certainly one of them. It's an inspired instrumental and the vocal take is just -- dreadful.

@blaze_dave (7.5) It's a fun song but a bit hit and miss. You have to be in the mood to listen to this.

@Rantaro (9.2) I know a lot of people hate this, but I absolutely love it. I think it’s great! Absolutely love her vocal performance on it.

@livefrommelbs (4) Let the record state that these four points are solely for the fact that Brit sounds like she's enjoying herself, and that makes me feel nice. Queen of generosity!

@Ana Raquel (0) This is the second time in my entire life I've listened to this song. The first time was when Glory was released. And I hope I don't need to listen to it ever again, because it is UNBEARABLE. She sounds awful. Even Donald Duck with flu would sound less nasal than that. The only compliment? The homonymous perfume smells good.

@chrisjche (6.5) While the vocal production on this is questionable, at least she sounds like she’s having fun!

@stereosalt (9) I’m a Private Show Stan! Me too!

@AstronautMikeDexter (7) It’s silly and goofy and I like it.

@M24 (0) The vocals in this one… I know this is probably her natural voice now, but I can't help but find it annoying to listen to.

@daninternational (4) Meghan Trainor? Get that fire exit door I'm off!

@WhenTheSunGoesDown (4) I have never been able to listen to this song without laughing. The vocals are so dark sided. I love it.

@BeingNormal (1) I feel cringe, not sexy Some people have not put on a private show OR pulled the curtains until they closed and it shows!

@Guyhawke! (8) The instant-grat songs released prior to ‘Glory’ are amongst my least favourites on the album. However, after surviving ‘Britney Jean’ it was an enormous relief to hear Personalitney show up on each and every one. And not just show up, but chew the scenery like her life depended on it. Britney’s vocals on ‘Private Show’ are exaggerated to the point of parody, transforming what could have been a sexy come-on into a comic romp. You can tell Britney isn’t taking herself seriously, bleating over the (show me how you) burlesque arrangement with a knowing wink. ‘Private Show’ isn’t a great song, but it’s an absolute riot to listen to.

@Milotic (5) I just can't stand the chorus ddd. There are good moments, though.

@BreatheBox (5) ridiculous but kinda fun

@Runawaywithme (7) I can see this song getting quite a bit of a hard rep, but I just can't help but love it. It's ridiculous. It's silly. It's camp. It's like Megan Trainor on acid. Britney sounds like she's having a blast. Also "apple pie/satisfy" is a genius lyrical couplet.

@lilylu (10) I imagine this will be divisive, but this is everything I love about Britney. Her albums would be nothing without a quirky avant garde moment. It's personality, it's humor, and I think this is what makes Britney who she is. I agree.

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Holly Something

Holly Something

People have been calling for this one for a while now...












































From the early days...





























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147th Place
I Will Still Love You (with Don Philip)
(from ...Baby One More Time)

Average: 5.540

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High Scorer: 9.9 x 1 (@Epic Chocolat)
Low Scorer: 1 x 1 (@theincredibleflipper)
My Score: 9

I Will Still Love You appears as track on the debut album ...Baby One More Time and is a duet with Don Philip. The song was written and produced by Eric Foster White who did a lot of work on the first album. Don appeared on X Factor USA when Britney was a judge and let's just say it made for some cringeworthy television. He also rerecorded the song as a tribute to Britney in 2015:



My thoughts: I am unashamed to say I've always really loved this, and it's one of my go to songs from the debut. I think they sound really cute together and while it's cheesy I don't mind it at all.
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@chrisjche (5.5) I just think of X Factor when I hear this song now...but it’s a cute duet and they both sound great! I hope Don is doing better today than he was at that audition. Here's hoping...

@unnameable (9) Britney really should do more duets

@cdd216 (6.5) They sound a lot nicer together than I remember. I don't know why I thought I hated this song... I don't get why people hate it either!

@boombazookajoe (3) Sorry to this man. I was reminded why I haven't listened to this song since like 1998.

@blaze_dave (7) I love that this was her first duet and another nice pop ballad. Not the best ballad off the album though but it cute and playful.

@joeee (8) I imagine Don Philip is going to negatively impact the average of this song with his horrific X Factor audition, but this is actually a really nice song, and one of the stronger moments on the album. Hard agree!

@Rantaro (7) I do genuinely like this song, even though I know a lot of Britney fans don’t.

@maikos87 (7) Hadn’t listened to it in years, it’s a cute midtempo bop and I love the “Time may take us apart” part so much!

@Ugly Beauty (5) cute for song-used-in-background-for-'90s-teen-movies-or-shows but other than that..

@livefrommelbs (3) Was already mediocre before that traumatising X Factor audition. After that, worse.

@daninternational (5.5) Not as bad as I thought at the time

@AstronautMikeDexter (6.5) Cute, but cute next to gorgeous, ya know? I mean *I* think this is gorgeous so...

@M24 (2.5) The chorus is nice enough. Sadly, it drags on for a bit too long.

@WhenTheSunGoesDown (6) Poor Don Philip. Literally.

@Guyhawke! (8) ‘I Will Still Love You’ is unremarkable, but Britney and Don’s vocals blend effortlessly and there’s enough showboating from both of them to add some tension as it unfolds. This one is worth a reappraisal. I think they sound great together as well.

@Milotic (7.5) The chorus is actually kind of catchy.

@Music Is Death (6) *Yawn* It’s a nice enough song, and I think they actually sound good together, and it’s well-produced but I’m always so bored listening to it. It’s cute, catchy, and sweet, but there are so many other Britney ballads I’d rather listen to. And as nice as they sound together, I kinda wanna hear what a solo version would be like. I'm not sure a solo version would be as good, I think playing off of each other vocally makes the song work better.

@lilylu (8) It's a very-of-its-time duet with over the top adlibs and it's kind of cheap and I think that's wonderful :-)

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Last edited:
andru

andru

he/him
I'd probably like "Private Show" more if it remained a random release to go with the perfume, but it doesn't really suit "Glory" in my opinion and being among much better songs it really stands out to me as one of the album's worst offerings, so I'm not sad to see it be the album's first elimination. She does sound like she's having a lot of fun on it though!

Not fussed with "I Will Still Love You" being eliminated. It was my lowest score for the "...Baby One More Time" album.
 
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