I know I'm overreacting so I just wanna say that first of all and please don't bother with any snarky replies. In fact, don't bother replying at all, I just wanna vent.
I really wanna listen to this album. Like really. I think I'll love it.
But I've tried three times, and I can't.
I was sort of semi-following this era and this thread until Stupid Love, which I thought was enjoyable, but lacking substance. Couldn't keep up with the thread after that since it moves a million fucking miles an hour but a few weeks later I noticed Rain On Me pop up on YouTube, so I gave it a listen and really enjoyed it. It made me excited to hear more.
Then a few days later I played the video. I guess I was mentally primed to see something upsetting knowing it was a song with Ariana released on the anniversary of the Manchester bombing, but I wasn't prepared for the opening shot to be Gaga lying apparently dead on the floor with screws in her face.
I managed to watch about twenty or thirty seconds, until the point where the chorus kicks in and shrapnel starts raining own on Gaga, and then I started to feel sick and had to shut it off. I haven't been able to listen to the song without thinking about it since (although I still think it's a great song.)
I didn't think it would affect my ability to enjoy the album, but three times I've tried to play it and I haven't made it past track two. All I can think about when I press play is that video. And its connotations. And then I start to feel nauseous and I have to turn it off.
It's pissing me off because Alice sounds like a banger and I think I'd love it if this weren't holding me back from listening to it properly.
But I honestly can't shake this horrible feeling no matter what I do and I'm worried I'm gonna have to just give the album a miss. But I really want to fucking listen to it, ugh.
Okay, okay, rant over. Please just ignore me unless you have something actually constructive to say, thank you.