Losing weight | The Popjustice Forum

Losing weight

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Music City Queen, Sep 30, 2018.

  1. Basically, I need to lose weight - not want to. I am overweight, I've done the NHS BMI test thing but in addition to that, it's having the fucking worse effect on my mental health, to the point of being on the brink of tears and feeling like a fucking moron for even just typing this out but at the same time, I know I need to. It's this, or nothing because I feel too ashamed/embarrassed/whatever to say anything to family or friends.

    I genuinely have no idea what to do. As I said, I'm too embarrassed to say anything to my family - to the point I'm sometimes eating meals that I feel genuinely sick eating. There's been nights I've genuinely went out purely to avoid eating the food that's being prepared.

    Then I feel ridiculously self conscious even walking down the street with earphones in, in case my breathing gets heavy from walking too fast and people start to stare so I have no idea how going to the gym would go.

    Basically in a word: help.

    I'm just going to say thanks in advance for any responses, because I'm a shitebag and I no doubt won't respond to this thread again even if I'm reading the replies.
    ysev, toby3000, berserkboi and 11 others like this.
  2. Hi @Voodoo! I know it's easier said than done but you should not be embarrassed about this. If anything you should be proud that you're taking steps to lose weight if it's negatively affecting you or your health.

    Now, I'm by no means an expert but I went through a very significant period of losing weight when I was younger and so I gained what I deem to be a lot of valuable information. I'd be interested in PMing about this, if you'd like. I wrote a very wordy response but I'm wondering if you'd be willing to discuss it more in depth privately. I'll leave the option open to you!
    kal, penghuwan, Kuhleezi and 9 others like this.
  3. Find something you like, sports wise. Dancing, zumba, even walking fast listening to your music for an hour.
    And tell your family you're watching what you eat for a while or eat smaller portions. And try eating fruit and veg, and less stuff that's in a package.
    ysev, kal, K94 and 2 others like this.
  4. Simply; if it’s green, it’s good, so try and eat as many vegetables as you can. I like kale, spinach, broccoli and avocad and they’re so rich in vitamins which will be great for your energy levels and development. Fruit is also a great source of vitamins and a brilliant alternative to processed sugar snacks, but it can have a lot of natural sugar, which isn’t inherently bad but can contain lots of calories, so don’t overdo it. Watch out for sugar and saturated fats - keeping those to a minimum will help you lose weight in combination with exercise. Not all fat is bad, however. Eating things like nuts and seeds is a great way to get protein into your diet and healthy fats are great for your skin and hair.
    Sugaboy, ysev, Txetxu and 2 others like this.
  5. Less sugar, that’s the biggest culprit in weight gain, I believe. And some excercise I guess, I think something like yoga would be perfect, specially in combating anxiety or any type of "being stuck in your own head going in circles". But I think just a diet change is usually enough for most.
    That said, there will always be things you’ll get hung up about yourself, and I think we all could stand to just accept our flaws, even while we strive to change them. The beauty is that we aren’t perfect, and once you are comfortable in your own skin, it shows. It radiates and people are drawn to that, so just do things that make you happy while you work on losing weight. It’s going to be a long process, so while not enjoy it?
    kal and Music City Queen like this.

  6. Hey
    I know this feeling. I’ve slowly put weight on ever since I was a kid. Have done too many fad diets to count. It really does take a tole on not just physical health but mental health too. Up until a year or so ago, I’d basically accepted that I was gonna die young, I was that over weight.
    I started Slimming World earlier in the year(March). And it’s genuinely been life changing. It’s really basic and easy to follow. There are no weight loss shakes or supplements. It lays out the things you should eat the most and the things you need to cut back on. The woman who runs my group always says “you lose weight in the kitchen, exercise helps but at the end of the day, it’s what you eat”. I never feel hungry and I get my treats. The group itself is great, the support is there and there’s no judgement. You can talk and make friends and know that you’re not alone. There are people of all ages that go, male and female. I like to stay for the class, you pick up tips and get to hear everyone else’s stories. Try not to be embarrassed, excess weight affects so many people and it’s becoming more and more common.
    I’ve lost just under 7 Stone since March, and while I have a bit to go, I can finally see light at the end of the tunnel.
    You should try and check out a local slimming world group, it’s a bit intimidating taking that first step in the door but it really can be life changing. I really enjoy it now and it doesn’t feel like I’m even trying anymore.
  7. I'm currently on a weight loss plan. I decided to do Keto as sugar is a big problem of mine and I needed to change my eating habits more than anything. I have a sweet tooth and always travel for work and never have a set schedule, so food was often about convenience more than fuel.

    I've ordered all my meals from Keto Fridge, so I have variety of thoughtfully made food and not limited to what I could whip up at the end of a long day or grab on the fly. While it's certainly a challenge to stay on track at at times, you do get more resolve as you go along.

    Biggest thing for me, I don't weigh myself. I don't need to obsess about numbers and set myself up for possible disappointment if I don't hit a weekly goal. I'm just going off of how I feel and how my clothes fit.

    Remember, everything is connected. If you're not physically fit enough to exercise the way you need to, focus on your food intake and get some weight off and then your physical stamina and capabilities will improve.
  8. RJF


    Hello! A few years back I got really ill for a few weeks and what I took away from it was that my lifestyle was atrocious. Shit diet, no exercise, smoking. I was a miserable mess. I wanted to change things. So I understand that even asking a bunch of anonymous queers online can feel like a big deal, but it’s a good thing!

    I’m not going to get into particulars since everyone’s different but these days I eat healthy, I quit smoking, and I hit the gym three times a week... but I didn’t just suddenly do this one week. The changes I’ve made were done slowly, over the course of the last three years. You can do an aggressive diet change for a month and get results, sure, but it’s not sustainable and is a chore. Lifestyle changes, for me, had to happen slowly, to get truly ingrained. My ultimate goal wasn’t a target weight by a certain time; it was to be a happier, fitter person, and doing that is kind of a lifetime deal. So I haven’t counted calories, or stepped on scales. Quantifying it... would have again made it a chore to obsess over, so I haven’t done it. I’ve dropped clothes sizes, I feel better, I look better than I do in photos from years back, and people keep telling me I’ve lost weight. That’s good enough for me.

    Just... take things at your own pace? It took me a year to genuinely make my healthier diet rote and routine. It took another year to really feel like I knew what I was doing at the gym (And I needed help; I cannot recommend PTs enough. Even just to familiarise yourself with the equipment. The gym also is not scary! No one’s judging you; we’re all there for the same thing and everyone is too focused on doing that to care what you’re doing. Put on some bops and go wild.) and now after a year of having it all in synergy, it’s... the best. And I never thought I would be like this.
    So it’s possible.

    Also, you might be surprised at how many of your friends struggle with similar issues if you talk about it with them, even if you think they wouldn’t. I was shocked at the camaraderie I found with people who I honestly wouldn’t have thought had similar issues so you’re not alone.

    So yeah, it’s hard at the start, and it might take a while, but it’s so important to find the way that works best for you, and that sometimes takes time and some trial and error. You’re basically remodelling your lifestyle and that doesn’t happen overnight. But ultimately, a chocolate bar shouldn’t be a routine wrecking crisis. It’s all about balance. Just be patient; you’ll get results.

    Good luck!
    Last edited: Oct 1, 2018
    Sugaboy, ysev, kal and 43 others like this.
  9. Yeah, Slimming World helped me lose 5 stone without it feeling like too much of a chore (and without any exercise because I'm a lazy piece of shit), though if you're living at home and being catered for it might be a struggle getting them on board too, but the diet is much more welcoming than a lot of the stricter ones so you might be able to convince them.

    It's all about cooking from scratch, making sure you get plenty of fibre, and trying not to overdo on saturated fats and sugars. You can eat as much meat, fruit, veg, potatoes, rice and pasta as you want, as long as it's prepared properly. The groups really do help motivate you to keep at it, it's just taking that first step that's the hardest.
  10. Who are you and where is Rashida?
    Mods !!
    account hack confirmed!
  11. I have a strange relationship with food because I was a very overweight child, which peaked at about 11 years old. This weight disappeared when I entered my teenage years (I think I weighed the same when I was 17 as I did as a child, despite growing to 6ft tall). As a result, no matter how slim I am now as an adult, that feeling of being the fat kid never goes away and I am hyper-vigilant about what I eat.

    The main thing to really do is educate yourself about food. A lot of things we have been brought up to believe are "healthy" (breakfast cereal, yoghurt, fruit juice, granola bars) are just loaded with sugar and unnecessary calories. Shop-bought sauces are also high in sugar/oil, and should just be avoided if you are trying to lose weight.

    Find some form of exercise that you enjoy, not that you feel like you have to do. I love running because I put on great headphones and list to high-energy pop music, and the two just go together. I've never joined a gym because I know I find weights and cross-trainers miserable. Go with your instincts not against them, otherwise you're just setting yourself up to fail.

    Cutting back on alcohol is also a must. A bottle of wine is nearly 700 calories - you wouldn't sit and eat three Mars bars in one sitting, but that's the equivalent of what you're doing when you drink.

    It's definitely a journey for everyone, and the most important thing is to find something that fits you and your personality. I'm quite a neurotic, type A personality, so I find knowing the exact calories of everything helps - for others, this is their worst nightmare. Educate yourself, try different things, and don't beat yourself up if you treat yourself. It's so easy for discipline to become obsession, and so you really need to build in some slack to enjoy yourself however you plan your health and wellbeing.
    kal, Sinful, Slice of Life and 10 others like this.
  12. One thing i would like to add as an overweight/obese person that is going on a diet, is that if you live alone, don't know how to cook and need to change your lifestyle with having enough money to spare, there must be dieticians who prepare your healthy food for you and send it to you. It is my second week with my dietician and eventhough there are times when it gets hard, i find it a lot easier to carry on with this diet. The other plus is i'm learning what to cook, eat and how to portion control.

    Spending greater money to this service also works as a reason to not to spend any more on food.
  13. Also, don’t force yourself to eat things you don’t like. It’s one of the reason I always gave up on “diets” before. You just end up hating it and will give up after a week or two.
    Aldi, Lidl, Tesco etc all have fairly wide varieties of fruit and veg for practically nothing. Find out what you like and get those, fill up on the fruit and try and fill your dinner plate with atleast half veg. But as I said, don’t force yourself to eat things you can’t stand just because they’re good for you. You’ll figure out what you like and hate as you go forward. Any meat is great, so long as you cut the fat off and remove the skin. Just make sure to prepare it in a healthy way. Oven baked, grilled or even in a frying pan, just don’t add in any oil. The Fry Lite 1 calorie spray is quite good, comes in a few different flavours.
    Remorque and Music City Queen like this.
  14. POPGASM and Vasilios like this.
  15. Honestly I would.

    Anyway, I'm not exactly skinny but I try to eat lots of vegetables, fish and meat. I avoid bread and eat pasta only once or twice a week. I love sweets so I usually have breakfast with a croissant or a muffin and avoid them during the rest of the day.
    No sauces, no alcohol, no sugars.
    toby3000 likes this.
  16. Skinny legend!
  17. In addition to the advice offered by other users, I'd recommend seeking professional help for your mental health struggles. I can't speak to exactly what you're feeling, but I've been trying to lose weight for years and the most difficult part for me was managing my mental health. I know how to manage my diet well, but I too often fall into a depressive rut where all I feel like doing is eating garbage food to excess, feel bad about it the next day, eat more, rinse and repeat. Coming home from work and feeling too unmotivated and tired to go the gym has been another issue I faced. So taking whatever action you can to manage and work through mental health issues you're experiencing will only help you stick to your weight loss plans and make them lasting changes.
    Slice of Life, junglefish and Dave like this.
  18. I struggled privately for a long time because my weight issue wasn't super obvious - I've always looked 'thin', but I gain weight easily in my stomach and thighs. A few years ago I had about 20 lbs that I needed to lose and I ended up in an endless cycle of losing 5 lbs and then putting it back on; I kept trying stupid fad diets and then over-exercising for short periods before falling back on my old habits. Basically, as others have said, it's a bit of trial and error to find out what works best for you.

    For me, I've stopped keeping junk food in my place so that when I wanna snack (I smoke a lot of weed and always want to snack), I'm basically forced to eat something healthy. But I'll never starve or deny myself indulgences - if I go out to a restaurant to eat, nothing is off limits, and I usually set aside a day or two a week where I can eat whatever I want. Generally, on Monday-Friday I try to have balanced meals: smoothie, oatmeal or eggs for breakfast; salad, sushi, or a chicken wrap for lunch; and then mix it up for dinner. My snacks are generally fruit, veggies, nuts, or bars. If I eat well all day, I don't feel so bad for packing on carbs at dinner and having a snack later.

    I also very slowly worked my way up with exercise. I played soccer for years, but after that I basically stopped doing any physical activity which was definitely the main cause of my weight gain happening around my stomach. I try to go for a walk every day when it's nice out and then I use the gym in my building 3 or 4 times a week. I've never used a trainer but a friend helped me out a lot the first few months - it really eased my nerves, as I was super self-conscious about walking into a gym and having no idea what I was doing. At this point I'm in the best shape of my life and I don't find my routine to be a chore at all, though it was at first. It has so positively affected by mental health, mood, and confidence. I hope you find a routine that works out for you!
    Remorque likes this.
  19. A footballer? On my popjustice?
  20. Not @RJF motivating me to finally get a gym membership.
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