Madonna: The Discography Rate - COMPLETE | Page 112 | The Popjustice Forum

Madonna: The Discography Rate - COMPLETE

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by RJF, Apr 19, 2020.

  1. RainOnFire

    RainOnFire Staff Member

    I don't think I realized just how savage the leaderboard would be till seeing the 2015 leaderboard. Skin at #38?! Bad Girl at #54?! Promise to Try at #70?!

    It's literally just dawning on me now that there can't be fifty songs in the Top 20 nn. This is going to be deadly.
  2. It should be Autotune Baby. There's 20-ish tracks I'd throw out before B'Day Song.
    Maki likes this.
  3. RJF



    227 SONGS

    165 VOTERS




    SCORE: 3.000

    2015 PLACEMENT: 209 of 210
    HIGHEST SCORE: 9 x 1 (@scottdisick94)
    LOWEST SCORE: 0 x 23 (@nikkysan @AshtrayHeart @djmakemewet @Dangerous Maknae @sfmartin @Cutlery @Suburbia @matthew. @madgemad @Endothelium @Andy French @Sail On @Dreampopboy @letuinmybackdoor @Fortune @RetroPhysical @Mister_G @Lila @clowezra @Digital Ghost @Markus1981 @happiestgirl)
    MY SCORE: 0/10

    The battle for the bottom actually ended up being one of the most thrilling battles across the voting period, as this and the song just above it were constantly swapping places. If only bottoms were as coveted and versatile in real life, huh?

    In retrospect, can you really blame us that much for getting excited about MDNA? I mean, look at those collaborators on paper: William Orbit, who had produced her finest ever album. Martin Solveig, a slightly indie left-turn choice into properly fizzy, technicolour pop. The Benassi brothers, who can typically turn out a banger or twelve. Klas Åhlund, who ROBYN. Nicki Minaj, pre-friendship with the Pennywise of pop. And perhaps the most thrilling collaborator of all: M.I.A. Supremely talented with a penchant for radical ideas both sonically and lyrically in her music, and in terms of spirit, probably the closest to Madonna's equal in the group. As close as one can be to Madonna's equal, which is, to say, not very. But yes, it seemed like they could really produce some bonkers, intriguing tracks together after the more mainstream Hard Candy and the standard tropes of "Celebration".

    So you can imagine the crushing disappointment when all it yielded was a fairly anaemic verse on the album's lead single, Miss Maya attempting to co-opt Madonna's stage during the 2012 Super Bowl half-time show with an ill-thought-out middle finger to America (which, when she couldn't pay the fine for, then had the gall to ask Madonna for a hand out!), and... this. This dumbass, poorly performed, poorly recorded studio jam that was probably done in the forty five minutes M.I.A. was actually in the studio with Madonna before she cut the cheque and bounced. It's just... ghastly and insipid, readers. There's really no other way to put it. Madonna has always kind of struggled with the idea of whimsy in her music, mostly because she's too much of a force to really sell it convincingly. Like I don't doubt she's having fun on this but the ill-fit of it all really just sums all the problems with the album up perfectly. What a waste of two amazing artists. But then again, maybe it's just a case of reaping what you sow considering the only person who probably spent less time in the studio for MDNA than M.I.A. was Madonna herself. Oh well.

    I'm not going even going to link to an audio for this song. Instead, here are some good M.I.A. songs. Farewell bidet song! "Isma burfdai evyday!" haunts my psyche whenever I'm on the edge of sleep at night.

    Last edited: Jun 16, 2020
  4. BTG


  5. RJF


  6. This is not her worst song by any means, but whatever. I'm far from caring it's gone.
  7. I'd have preferred Hey You keep its bottom spot, but this is also a more than acceptable first out.

    @scottdisick94 though, ma'am...
  8. First elimination? My personal choice would be "Cry Baby", but I can see it being "B-Day Song" or "Autotune Baby".

    Now that "Did You Do It?" was excluded, it's less obvious to predict the first song to leave the rate.

    Edit: Oh, okay. Nice to see it's not "Hey You", because it's definitely not her worst song
    Sprockrooster and Remorque like this.
  9. Happy birthday!

    KingBruno, Remorque and Maki like this.
  10. With the sheer size of the voting pool I wondered if our last place song would challenge ME!'s 51 zeroes from last year's BPG rate. Not even close...
  11. aux


    Not even two eliminations in and the Swedish Madonna is already getting mentioned.

  12. I'm forced to assume you gave over 200 10's, because there is no other way this score makes sense.
    evilsin, acl, Mr Blonde and 12 others like this.
  13. Wonderful. Not quite my least favourite (I scored two songs lower, this one got a 3), but a deserving last place. I was worried about some of my scores perhaps being harsh, but with the amount of 0s given thrown out here, I am most likely fine for the rest of the rate.

    Also a reminder that M.I.A. has gone off the deep end, so the fact that this collab didn't work out very well doesn't hurt as much anymore.
  14. Madonna is more than capable of whimsy (see: Cherish) but this is not it.
    Remorque likes this.
  15. RJF


    Also, as you'll probably notice as things wear on, I've gone very low-key in terms of graphics this time around. Doing a single cover for every song would have been an absolute pain and image hosts expiring render the entire exercise pointless after a few months. I wanted to make the eliminations as futureproof as possible this time, not to mention there are rumblings of the forum switching servers soon, which mangled the formatting in two of the three parts of the last disocgraphy rate, so... I'm going for a strategy that basically lets me enjoy doing the write ups. Things will get more elaborate closer to the top, I imagine.
  16. RJF


    Eh, I wouldn't describe "Cherish" as whimsical. It's definitely sweet but it's also overwhelmingly sincere. This is just... silly, and dumb.
  17. I just played B Day song to remind myself how bad it is and then Best Friend started playing in the background and now I think my score for it was a bit harsh. Mess.
    Remorque likes this.
  18. Yes perhaps Dear Jessie is a better example.
    Remorque likes this.
  19. B-Day Song is dire but I threw it a 2. There are a few worse offenders.
    FridayNight, acl, Mr Blonde and 2 others like this.
  20. I don't find that song so offensive, it just feels unfinished, like it's a demo, but I do like the "and the beat goes on" part. If they kept on working - maybe it could have been good.
    Crisp X, FridayNight, acl and 6 others like this.
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