Madonna: The Discography Rate - COMPLETE | Page 125 | The Popjustice Forum

Madonna: The Discography Rate - COMPLETE

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by RJF, Apr 19, 2020.

  1. RJF


    Last elimination of the evening! It's crowning!



    SCORE: 4.121

    2015 PLACEMENT: 202 of 210
    HIGHEST SCORE: 10 x 1 (@Euphoria)
    LOWEST SCORE: 0 x 16 (@aux @Dangerous Maknae @JMRGBY @Endothelium @fatyoshi @CasperFan @Skyline @unnameable @RetroPhysical @citoig @BTG @clowezra @eliminathan @M24 @sexercise @happiestgirl)
    MY SCORE: 6/10

    Did y'all maybe just do this a tad dirty? It's obviously obnoxious and self-aware about it, the idea of turning a baby's cry into a melodyned looped vocal hook is actually kind of rad, and in terms of the more out-and-out love songs on Rebel Heart, it doesn't really hit any major sore points for me in terms of lyrics. I would take this over something as trite and pedestrian as "HeartBreakCity" any day but I don't think we should have that conversation just yet. Yeah, the lyrics are maybe crossing a rather infantile line, but don't tell me y'all haven't been sending shit that's ten times more puerile to your tops while in lockdown. The whole thing is about not wanting a relationship and just wanting a fuck for God's sake. I would have expected it to do better in this climate! I also think it would probably be a little more liked if it didn't give the game away so utterly with the actual piercing baby cry at the start. I think it just activates the fight or flight response in every homosexual.

    Fun fact: I thought for years that this was one of Diplo's productions purely because the entire premise of the track seems to be something he would mastermind, but it actually seems to be a Mike Dean number with... Kanye West of all people, presumably back when he offered to executive produce the album for her (one of many albums he offered to do that for at the time, including Rihanna) only to not have the time because he was too busy executive producing his own meltdown. Now there's a man who needs a pacifier. His other credits on the album are for:

    Holy Water
    Wash All Over Me

    ...and this, which doesn't really give us a picture of what he was going for, but a Madonna album with the production helmed by Kanye West sounded like a fever dream in 2015. Alas, a lot about Kanye West wasn't meant to be, but we'll touch on all that another time...
  2. Thank god that's gone. I think it was my only zero.
  3. I didn't actually think this was that bad (after the horrible first 20 seconds), I gave it a 6.5.
    sfmartin and Remorque like this.
  4. Sixteen zeroes? Just admit that y’all hate fun already.

    At least we won’t have to endure 740 more posts complaining about it not being out
    Rem, Robsolete, evilsin and 21 others like this.
  5. Unless it's by Aaliyah, I don't wanna hear no damn baby in no damn song!

    Womanizer, Rem, K94 and 33 others like this.
  6. Autotune Baby is fine.
  7. Woo at two 'baby' songs leaving one after another.
    Good riddance to both!

    Oh my, I remember replaying this video back in the golden YouTube era. That and Double Rainbow (which I genuinely think is good) were my autotune go-tos at the time.

    Edit: R.I.P. Yosemitebear.
    Last edited: Jun 16, 2020
    Holly Something and Remorque like this.
  8. I actually can't remember a single thing about Autotune Baby other than the titular sample because the sound of a human infant crying is like a jackhammer being applied directly to my temple and I am physically unable to concentrate on anything else.
  9. The only song I gave a 0 to.

    Should've gone out before I'm Going Bananas, but at least it's out.
    Pop Life and Maki like this.
  10. I appreciate Autotune Baby, but I don't like it. The crying... it just grates.
    Phonetics Girl and Maki like this.
  11. Autotune Baby's a cute girl, but if those first 25 seconds didn't put me off at the time... Other than that she sounds fine, the production tries to be fun and I don't know if the nursery rhyme-ish middle 8 is necessary or not.

    Although here I am typing this up and, well...

  12. RJF


    @dodoriazarbon sis you did not perch in this thread for the entire voting period only to be in the wind when it finally starts. Give me clicks, give me engagement!!!
  13. Auto-Tune Baby wouldn't be so bad if they removed the intro, but it's there and it's the worst moment of her entire discography.
    Maki likes this.
  14. Wills, K94, Robsolete and 48 others like this.
  15. That gif was made for moments like this.
  16. I just realized this has started dd. No relevant losses so far, and Autotune Baby totally deserves to leave in the first 5 elims.
    Remorque, Maki and soratami like this.
  17. A journey.
  18. RJF


    One of my most anticipated parts of this thread is how the discussion is going to evolve over the upcoming months. It’s all fun discussing the flops and the crap at the moment, but then we hit the stuff that some people don’t think is crap. Then we hit the okay songs. Then we hit the good songs. And then it’s...probably just pain all the way sksksks. Enjoy getting along with each other!
    GimmeWork, Rem, K94 and 40 others like this.
  19. I can bop to Autotune Baby because I don’t find the warped cries of an infant too distressing but I can see why that’s a dealbreaker for some.

    Cry Baby and Autotune Baby going out back to back just now feels funny cause I just became an uncle 20 minutes ago!
    Womanizer, Wills, Rem and 41 others like this.
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