Madonna: The Discography Rate - COMPLETE | Page 434 | The Popjustice Forum

Madonna: The Discography Rate - COMPLETE

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by RJF, Apr 19, 2020.

  1. RJF


    Because I want to be free of both this and y'all early today...



    SCORE: 8.464

    11 x 1

    2015 PLACEMENT: UP 50!!! - 97 of 210 (7.284)
    HIGHEST SCORE: 10 x 38 (@nikkysan @AshtrayHeart @cheida @eatyourself @HEARTCORE @m_dimitrov @discoteca @Lucy Honeychurch @sfmartin @OSHi @JMRGBY @soratami @GimmeWork @Andrew.L @elear @Andy French @Up Down Suite @Dreampopboy @Coochi @scottdisick94 @Zdarlight @joeee @Xanax @Jimmyandroid @paperboyfriendd @Crisp X @Lila @Pop Life @Rogue @TheChoirgirlHotel @KingBruno @Digital Ghost @Trinu 3.0 @ufint @nametag @Markus1981 @FrozenNight @Weslicious)
    LOWEST SCORE: 3 x 1 (@Filippa)
    MY SCORE: 6/10

    ...Oh, fine.

    And Music loses its last remaining album track, which... might be our highest climber in the entire rate unless I'm forgetting something else earlier that dove up massively in the lower reaches of the rate. "Impressive Instant" gains over a full point in score, and climbs fifty placements from its 2015 finish. What caused this? Why this track? Why now? Who was this? Why? Why? Why? It's nicely produced but... that's it? What else is there? I don't get it, I don't want to get it. You can do whatever you want behind closed doors but don't rub it in my face. It has been miserably out its depth for weeks, and I'm simply glad it's gone now.

    Girls, look inside yourselves and see the truth: this is a silly, glitchy bleep bloop bop and nothing more. Birthed Charli XCX! This is a rate for talented songs and at this point, it has no talent. Instant? Perhaps. Impressive? I'm impressed at the gall it took to gobble up dozens of better songs and ascend far higher than it had any right to. But... no. This barely registers for me as something notable in Madonna's back catalogue, so thank God it's been stopped in its tracks outside the watermark of the Top 40. And speaking not reaching the Top 40, we once again tell the story of Music's lost fourth single, where Madonna wanted this to be the fourth single (trash) and Warner wanted "Amazing" instead (also trash). The result of the skirmish was that no one got what they wanted, no fourth single was released, and we were spared another offering from this thoroughly average album. Oop!

    I'll hand over to @clowNezra to EXPLAIN THEMSELVES:

    "I'm ready to be questioned on this, but this pretty much encapsulates everything I love about Madonna. Forward thinking (this still sounds as futuristic as when it was released), camp, ridiculous, completely unique, relentlessly her."

    The song was performed during the Drowned World Tour, which was some high school show proppery bullshit involving those tunnels that kids crawl through some flashlights, and Madonna singing almost entirely from the back of her throat. It was also performed during that two second promo """tour""" for the album. I've linked to both performances below. Enjoy!

  2. RJF



    Burning Up

    Dress You Up

    Papa Don't Preach
    Open Your Heart
    Live To Tell
    La Isla Bonita

    Like A Prayer
    Express Yourself
    Till Death Do Us Part
    Oh Father


    Deeper And Deeper

    Human Nature
    Bedtime Story

    Drowned World/Substitute For Love
    Ray Of Light
    Nothing Really Matters
    Sky Fits Heaven
    The Power Of Goodbye

    Don't Tell Me
    What It Feels Like For A Girl

    American Life
    Nothing Fails
    X-Static Process
    Die Another Day
    Easy Ride

    Hung Up
    Get Together

    God Control

    Into The Groove
    Crazy For You
    Justify My Love
    Rescue Me
    Beautiful Stranger​
  3. Take a Bow destroying the magical little sequencing moment of Sanctuary and Bedtime Story remains the most jarring thing about it
  4. I gave Impressive Instant a 9 but I'm glad it's gone so that people can finally stop bloody going on about it. Bleepy bloopy synths are just my thing and I make no apologies.
    Chezam, Womanizer, phoenix123 and 2 others like this.
  5. Take a Bow is neither here nor there (reflected in my 5 score). Take a Bow and You'll See are bookends to two of my favourite Madonna singles and videos (Bedtime Story and Human Nature), which is kind of jarring since both of them missed the Top 40 in the US. She was facing an uphill battle with the musical landscape of the time and I kind of have respect for her for doing what she had to do to still collect her hits, even if the outcome is painfully subdued and boring. She did it in such a strategically business minded and typically Madonna way that I can't hate her for it.
    Cutlery and nikkysan like this.
  6. I wouldn’t be mad at Jump or Intervention leaving next.

    I mean, Dress You Up and Express Yourself could go too, but I know that’s not going to happen.
    Last edited: Sep 5, 2020
  7. Jump can definitely go now.
  8. Nope!
    I'm still on overdose of this song because it was on MTV every! damn! morning! while i was waiting to leave the house to catch the bus to school. For months! (This and the Levi's Commercial song of the time. Sigh. The 90s).

    I'm with Mum on this one. Hope she won't dust it off, ever.
  9. Take A Bow and Impressive Instant in the same day? Why not just stab me in the face?
    theelusivechanteuse likes this.
  10. rdp



    (Deserved xx)
  11. I have a soft spot for Take a Bow and Secret, because the melodies (along with Prince's Most Beautiful Girl in the World) are forever engraved into my childhood memories. I didn't even know it was Madonna or who Madonna was at the time. I must say Secret did a better job at engraving though.
    Listening to Impressive Instant in 2000 (when futurism was a THING) was an absolute system shock. When it comes to tuned vocals there was Believe and then there was THIS. Definitely a moment for Madonna the Innovator.
    Maki, rav4boy and Push like this.
  12. RJF


    Me eliminating both "Take A Bow" and "Impressive Instant" in the dead of a Saturday morning when they'll probably get less attention, but more than they deserve. The mind of a mastermind.
  13. Impressive Instant is a gorgeous girl but yeah, she was overstaying her welcome. Take A Bow is...everything the write-up said. Gorgeous sounding, but not one I seek out. She looks possibility peak-stunning in the video, but I can’t watch it because the bit where she drags her nails across the walls makes me physically ill.
  14. Us singy singy singy redacteds won!!
  15. I feel the need to share that the synth in Forbidden Love (Confessions) reminds me of the giants in Majora’s Mask.

  16. Take A Bow is one of my favorite songs ever, not just by Madonna. And also, I think most of my favorites are down in their placements this round?! What’s up with that??? lol.
    berserkboi likes this.
  17. The album tracks left being:

    Till Death Do Us Part
    Sky Fits Heaven
    X-Static Process
    Easy Ride

    Wig, ok. I’d have sacrificed one or two of the AL ones to see either Forbidden Love and Waiting/Secret Garden make it but not a bad crop to make it this far.
  18. "Take a Bow" is quite lovely, but perhaps the most (actually, the only) dated ballad from that album, which affected my score a bit.
    Funnily enough, it's my third lowest score from "Bedtime Stories", yet it still got a 7.5 from me - talent!
    I wouldn't call it overrated at all, but comparing it to the treatment of the other ballads from that album (and also "You'll See", "This Used to Be My Playground" and "I Want You"), it does seem a bit overblown.

    Speaking of overrated ballads, get "Crazy for You" out.
  19. Also:
    Three highest climbers of the rate (so far) all being from "Music". Maybe the taste did improve a bit compared to the previous rate.
  20. Erotica deserved Music's climbing stats and the fact half of it bombed out right on the brim of the Madonna Hot 100... I hate it
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