Rita Ora. | Page 495 | The Popjustice Forum

Rita Ora.

Discussion in 'Pop & Justice' started by Melodee, Jan 30, 2014.

  1. She can't be shielded from criticism for being a bisexual woman but also distance herself from the subject when it's brought up. It just doesn't work.
     
    Mr Blonde, Lost Boy, Animalia and 8 others like this.
  2. Cant she express herself without belittling why labels are important to other members of the community?
     
    1991, Lost Boy, Animalia and 8 others like this.
  3. This is... still asinine though.

    The people calling out Rita are largely... queer women. There's no element of misogyny - queer women don't have issues with Rita Ora cause she's a woman. It's like when people tried to go defend Iggy by going "but Eminem!" to imply an element of misogyny when the people who largely took issue with Iggy were black women who also hate Eminem too.

    There's such a weird.. misappropriation of social justice rhetoric that prioritizes personal validation and individual identity over structural privation that it loses any kind of cognizant understanding of what harm actually is and what causes said harm, to where Kevin Spacey tries to come out as a way to gloss over that he was a pedophile.

    Like an identity being "valid" is... an obtuse concept if stretched to its limits. Like... are Rita's experiences real? Are her emotions what she's felt? Sure. But it's possible for Rita Ora to be valid while, at the same time, her actions are also harmful and fuel harm onto queer women.

    Someone mentioned BDSM and it's the same thing - sure, I'm sure there are some women who genuinely like to be choked. Their kinks are "valid". Sure. Yes. Fine. No one should tell them they shouldn't let men choke them. It's their body, their choices, their experiences, etc. But then that person can't promote their experiences in a vacuum; their enjoyment of being choked by men does not cancel out a culture of physical violence by men done onto women. Any personal empowerment experienced by them of giving into their kinks shamelessly does not suddenly make the act of a man choking a woman an inherently female empowering one.

    Part of choice empowerment is the emphasis on choice - choices have to be driven from consent; they cannot be coerced or it's not longer choice empowerment. The tropes in Girls, based on what many queer women are saying, play heavily into the the culture of coercion aimed at sapphic women into giving into men's fantasy and desire, which again, results in real-world violence.

    This is a bad argument and a bad post.
     
    Last edited: May 16, 2018
  4. I feel like Rita can bounce back from this and her queer fans will be a lot more forgiving towards her if she shows she understands why they're upset with her. This "I said what I said" mentality she has towards it right now is not cute. She's likely very stubborn hence why she has this attitude but she needs to wake up and fast.
     
  5. Oh wow. Another confirmation that she really ain't that smart.
     
    headztrong and inevitable like this.
  6. I didn’t see a second post about Harry and brought you into the conversation not knowing that. I’ve apologized, again, and continued to put my foot into my mouth. I agree with the points you’ve made and am genuinely sorry to bring you into it again!
    Again I made a point that made sense in my head but I didn’t think twice and hit post and I see the consequences so I am sorry for taking a big thought and making a throwaway comment!!
     
    slaybellz and Sanctuary like this.
  7. I’m actually hovering over the unstan button and I never thought I’d say that. Rita has handled this in the most offputting, thoughtless way. She’s going to have to put in a lot of listening and learning for me to forgive this.
     
    constantino, Animalia, aniraz and 7 others like this.
  8. She has kinda handled it terribly and I really want her to talk about it immediately. She has the tools to be massive in the UK and she's about to fuck up her own career by refusing to acknowledge why her own fans are disappointed in her.
     
  9. Brigittenielsenlaughing.gif
     
  10. I doubt the apology was even written by her.
     
    Blue6010 and Petty Mayonnaise like this.
  11. Well yes, it’s our problem, it’s being our problem for decades, ages and who knows right? She just wanted to make a song about girls getting drunk and being sexually playful... Oh wait, wasn’t it about empowering women? Oh no, my bad! It was based on her experiences, right? Who knows at this point! And I’m almost sure this mess and her new statements will go to oblivion the second she has the opportunity to put them in a shelf just to again redeem our sexual orientations to a “phase”.

    I know I’m getting personal right now but it’s this kind of people that made my life a living hell while I was discovering myself and my sexuality, to this day my own family can’t believe I like both genders and everything in between because that’s what people do when they are unsure and curious, there’s gotta be something wrong with me or I'm just being greedy... this is the extent this message has in other people lives.
     
  12. I’m pretty sure this song will mean something different every time she opens her mouth which has been the case so far and that’s not a good look.
     
  13. Yeah the apology looks even more hollow after her running her mouth on stage. Like, did she think nobody there was going to say something or that the apology meant people just magically forgot? I'm just confused why she would do something so dumb, but that's par for the course with this whole release.
     
    nomoresadsongs, R92, -Jay- and 3 others like this.
  14. This "sorry if you think this is offensive" rather than "sorry for being offensive and tone deaf" is a horrific approach.
     
  15. How hasn’t anyone painted the picture for her? Girlfriend needs to learn!
     
  16. She's a douchebag. Plain and simple. And fuck anyone who continues to defend her after that stage comment.

    I've refrained from getting into it because I didn't want to co-opt the conversation from the voices that matter here - queer and bi women - but a lot of the shit rhetoric that she's peddled and doubled down on is reminiscent of stereotypes I've had thrown at me as a bi man and this entire debacle has really been eye opening.

    I was willing to give her the tiniest benefit of the doubt, but doubling down in such an incredibly obnoxious and awful way? Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out. If she pushes this any farther, it's honestly going to get to the point where I'm going to start actively rooting for her to fail. This entire thing is just leaving such a bitter taste in my mouth.
     
    Wishlight, AmericanMoney, acl and 8 others like this.
  17. I'm seeing Rita in Birmingham later today. I'm looking forward to it in terms of the fact that I'm sure she'll put on a great show, and I've liked so many singles. Like most of you though, I'm disappointed with the problematic nature of 'Girls'... and with Rita herself. "I wrote this song as a celebration, if people can’t see that it’s their problem." - wow. All of this has really put a dampener on my goodwill towards her.

    I only tend to lurk here, but this thread has been a great place to find well-reasoned and articulate points of view, so thank you for that. I've quoted a few replies to some friends - mainly other gay men, who have mostly maintained the stance that Girls is just a harmless bop, and that the likes of Hayley and Kehlani were overreacting... which has certainly lead to some heated exchanges! It's really opened my eyes to how some people don't take the concerns of queer women with the seriousness and respect they deserve, and judging by Rita's comment on stage tonight, that includes her too. That's honestly really sad. In terms of LGBT voices being listened to and respected, be it through music or other forms, I really thought 2018 was showing signs of being very progressive. Apparently a lot of people still have a 2008 frame of mind!

    I've been shocked to see that some Rita fans have targeted Hayley Kiyoko, placing blame on her for "forcing Rita to come out". Hayley was well within her rights as a queer female artist to share her concerns about the song lyrics, in relation to her own experiences and of the community at large. To even think that this contribution has "forced Rita to come out", let alone have people call her out for it, is absurd.

    Honestly, I really don't read Rita's statement as being a coming out moment - and far less as a forced one. All she did, beyond apologising for others being offended, was to reiterate what her purposefully released song alluded to in the first place. She put that out there herself. Where is the force?

    As far as I can see, at no point has Rita attributed "Bisexual" as a label to herself, so I find it curious that various news articles and her Wikipedia page now declares that she has come out as bisexual, using her pretty open-ended statement as a source.

    Rita is well within her rights not to label herself publicly, and she may very well be a part of the LGBT community. That's great. However, even if she is, that really doesn't excuse her from (seemingly) being wilfully ignorant to the plights of a community that she alludes she is a part of. If anything, that is more of a head-scratcher than if she was actually straight. Right now, the tactic seems to be to go on the defensive and to deflect, and that's really not cool - she needs to start listening and learning. Do better, Rita.
     
    Last edited: May 16, 2018
  18. The sound engineer should rig it so What I Need plays over Girls at the next gig.
     
  19. @Sanctuary and @ohnostalgia have set fire to the rain in this thread and I'm gagged at both how much people are getting educated and how poorly her team is handling this (but it shouldn't be surprising since her second al**m is nowhere in sight)
     
    Wishlight, Sanctuary, LP and 12 others like this.
  20. How funny, I was just thinking earlier today that What I Need is a perfect response to Girls.
     
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