The Ashley Tisdale Rate.

Atletico

Atletico

he/him
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Hair

Average: 6.50
Highest: 10 x 3 (@WhenTheSunGoesDown, @headztrong, @iheartpoptarts)
Lowest: 2 x 2 (@Totto, @Sally_Harper)

Ashley's sexual innuendo bop is here, disguised as an ode to messy hair. This analogy is confusing since she is definitely not the person to have messy hair, except for a few occasions such as the pictured above. I_CANNOT_USE_REAL_WORDS_PROPERLY_. I still remember watching my Headstrong bonus DVD countless times and being amazed at the fact that she spent about two hours getting her hair done. Regardless, this has collectively been voted the second worst song on Guilty Pleasure, something I am definitely not here for. I used to think there were two types of people in this rate: the ones that hate Hair or the ones that inexplicably adore it. I never expected this lovable mess to drop out before the top 25 in the rate, but it proved a rather divisive song score-wise: one minute it would receive a 9 and immediately after a 3, as the majority of scores was rather middling.

"I never realized sex hair was such an untapped songwriting well, but kudos for finding an underexplored subject" congratulates Plethorya. Is this a new title for her heiness Ashley? Queen of demystifying taboos in songs? DJHazey feels guilty (get it? Har har har.) for not loving this as much as certain users: "I know a certain someone (or two) who point to this song as an all-time favorite and I feel bad when I mention that it isn't even close for me. It's only mildly entertaining at best with literally what she's describing in the chorus...yes that's a lot of fun I agree *wink* [Push's note: mess.] However, it just sounds way too clunky for me and after everything on this album that has sounding so perfected and fully realized, this comes off as a half-baked novelty act. I have no problem listening to it, but I'd want to go back to some of my favorites in a hurry. I'm giving it a solid 7 and y'all will deal."

WhenTheSunGoesDown admits this "super catchy" album track was a candidate for his 11, and maintains "I will never stop being bitter that we didn’t get a ‘50s themed Hair music video." I'm thankful we even got a second video from Guilty Pleasure, teebs. "It’s just pure fun, this one. The 'la la la' line was always my fave!", praises iheartpoptarts, and I'm feeling bad for kicking this out. Why couldn't Delete You have gone first? (Although that one would've also hurt me, everything from now on out stings me, honestly.) Someone better demystify whatever mat.overboard, because I'm obviously not informed: "Little Mix's Hair is Charizard. Gaga's Hair is Charmeleon. Ashley's Hair is that Charmander with a teeny-tiny flame on its tail." Hmm. Sprocky 's grand rate discovery, as we all know, was the High School Musical trilogy, and he takes advantage of Hair to promote it. "I loved her hair a lot in HSM 1 + 2!", he says, and I agree. It was a bit off on 3 at times.

sexercise confesses to "fully recognize this is tuneless/poorly produced trash but I LOVE it." Is it your guilty pleasure, then? Alright, moving on, through his commentary we learn that Hair is still relevant in Shockbox's life: "I still sing this chorus to my husband if he's moaning about his hair." That seems quite funny! I wonder what he thinks of the song. constantino thinks it's "very…off. Her vocals are far too low in the mix, especially during the chorus, making it a complete non-event as a result. It’s a shame because this is really fun." OH, blame it on the mastering, don't blame it on Ashley, etc etc. Our eternal Headstrong stan headztrong seems very mixed on its follow-up album, but finds a highlight in Hair. (I_CANNOT_USE_REAL_WORDS_PROPERLY_. Pun not intended.) "Oh how I would love if the whole album sounded like this…truly an iconic song." Finally, GhettoPrincess moans it "seems very misplaced on this album, cheesy and more suited to the debut. The tuned vocals make it even worse." Forget about that. Let us all mourn the departure of a song that left us too soon. Let's mess up our hair and bop to this jam. Also, it deserved a single release with a video similar to that of Just a Little While by Janet Jackson, with Ashley filming herself on a camcorder. It'd slay.


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DJHazey

DJHazey

he/him
After listening to a bunch of people talking about their experiences with barbers running their hands through their hair in off-topic the other day, what I was saying about Hair's chorus is not a "mess". I_CANNOT_USE_REAL_WORDS_PROPERLY_.

This feels like a victory, because I was worried it would somehow outlast some of the legendary material from the album. "Flop to the Top" needs to exit next before it actually gets to the top.
 
Remorque

Remorque

He/Him
You're Always Here is sweet and it shows a nice sentiment as she wrote it for her grandfather and everything, but let's face it... It's no Slipped Away, isn't it? She sounds absolutely atrocious on it and there's just something jarring about those verses, though I do agree that the pre-chorus is the shining beacon of this song and the chorus is quite good too.
For the rest? It's just a giant, big MEH to me...

Hair sounds absolutely clunky as FUCK throughout. From the verses through to the chorus... FACT. But I still love it. Had I voted it would have gotten a high score from me, so maybe it would've helped it a little bit further.
 
Atletico

Atletico

he/him
Doo doo doo
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WHOA OH OH OH





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What I've Been Looking For

Average: 6.58
Highest: 10 x 2 (@iheartpoptarts, @DJHazey)
Lowest: 2 x 2 (@sexercise, @LA Hallucinations)

BOP TO THE TOP IS NOT BETTER THAN THIS. This is such a great song, probably one of my favorites from the first High School Musical. I had quite a special warmth for this one, and to this day it's one me and my friends quote the most. (We're a mess, I know.) I've always thought that Ashley and Lucas Grabeel's voices (in the roles of Sharpay and Ryan, of course) mesh seamlessly, and overall it's just a fantastic number. Aided by this song, Ashley managed to bag a nice chart record by becoming the first female artist to debut on the chart with two songs at once (this and Bop to the Flop, though that one paradoxically only reached #62, while our good old What I've Been Successing For peaked at #35). It also scanned gold in the US. Nonetheless, there is one problem with it, and I'll let WhenTheSunGoesDown explain it: "Yikes at siblings singing this as a duet." Unintentional queen of incest, I guess.

Let's get the detractors out of our way. sexercise calls it "a mess." You're a mess. "Not going to lie, I thought I'd put a Glee song on the playlist by mistake", says Plethorya. I've just imagined Lea Michele and Chris Colfer doing their version of this and 'no' is what I have to say. Sally_Harper "believes the reprise performed by Zac and Vanessa (Troy and Gabriella) immediately after in the movie. NO. It pales in comparison and it's dreary stuff. But I'll let you continue: "I do like the piano though, and I suppose it’s nice to have two different versions." Yes. Redeem yourself a bit. Rejoyce, though, because Sprocky also prefers the sappy imitation: "Okay, my boyfriend knows the lyrics and dance routine. I honestly liked the reprise better by Zac and Vanessa, so I could not 10 this." We need your boyfriend to join PJ teebs.

From here on out, it's all positivity! "C’mon HARMONIES!" exclaims constantino, who says it "is very preppy and sweet…but I don’t even mind. It’s got that nice pick-me-up feel to it without being too cheesy." Indeed! headztrong supposes listening to What I've Been Looking For was most likely "the first time most of us got blessed with her singing voice. It's one of the best HSM songs" Preach it! DJHazey correctly claims it is a "bop for the ages! Still love how they mess up the choreo at times and Sharpay gets all pressed about it. Love her voice especially when she gets extra nasally, I'm a sucker for it. Don't even mind Lucas's vocals because it obviously wouldn't be the same without them. It's such simple piano driven melody, but so addictive and all of the longer notes are always incredible." iheartpoptarts just knows it: "Forever the most iconic High School Musical song to me. Who needs Troy and Gabriella, anyway?"

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