The Ashley Tisdale Rate.

Now, for our last tie.



What If

Average: 7.38
Highest: 10 x 2 (@sexercise, @Sally_Harper)
Lowest: 4 x 1 (@Plethorya)

What If was released in May 2009 as a promotional single for Guilty Pleasure, in an iTunes Countdown strategy. I didn't like it then and I still don't like it much now, mostly because I don't care for overdramatic, cliché-ridden songs... by Ashley, at least. This could be more accurately compared to Unlove You, both classifying as the typical classic ballad from each album, though this is a lot more bearable. BUT WAIT A SECOND. Right when the pre-chorus ends wouldn't the Unlove You chorus fit perfectly? YES IT WOULD AND IT'S DISTURBING. Anyway, my 5.5 might have been too harsh, now I'd probably give it an extra point. Curiously the release prompted the second highest peak of the Guilty Pleasure songs in the US, reaching #1... on the Billboard Bubbling Under Hot 100 chart. Isn't that sad? Popinjustice.

The pre-chorus is the best part and DJHazey agrees with me: "How Do You Love Someone sounds like her most personal song, but it was actually this one she had a hand in writing. Ashley simply asks her lover if they will be there when she actually needs them. I'll be honest and say I've always overlooked this song, but it is sounding truly breathtaking right now. I'm a sucker for a nice piano ballad and this delivers with Ashley's vocals surprisingly on point for such a statement piece as this. Points for the magical pre-chorus which reminds me of a classic melody that I can't seem to put my finger on right now." WhenTheSunGoesDown is "so here for super dramatic ballads like these", while sexercise crowns Ashley as "Queen of Ballads."

is elevated to heaven: "WAIT. WHAT A FUCKING MINUTE. This is…good. I’ve come to have very low expectations of Ashley’s ballads but this is surprisingly stellar. Colour me impressed. This sounds like The Best Damn Thing-era Avril and I am GAGGED." The remaining voters... are not. GhettoPrincess prudently opines that "the verses are beautiful but the chorus runs into generic territory unfortunately", whereas headztrong confesses they're "not here for ballads tbh, but as far as it goes it’s quite listenable". Queen of being listenable. iheartpoptarts gets a little bit of justice after her 11 and my second 11 if there was one got kicked out. "Honestly, I’m a bit bored!" Drag'em with kindness!



Staff member
What If is her best ballad.

People actually care for Switch? It's been 7 years and I still couldn't tell you how the chorus goes. Not Like That needs to exit asap too, and I'm ready for It's Alright It's OK and How Do You Love Someone to bounce.
You asked for it...




Average: 7.38
Highest: 10 x 2 (@Conan, @Reboot)
Lowest: 3 x 2 (@mat.overboard, @Totto)

What was I thinking when I rated this? I actually gave it an 8.5 which is a straight-up mess. This is nice and all, the chorus is its salvation, but why this made the cut in lieu of the album's title track (!!!) and Whatcha Waiting For baffles me to this day. It's just so passable and uninspired, coming off as some sort of cross between the more immature, naïve content of Headstrong and the pop rock sound of Guilty Pleasure. Switch was utilised as a promotional tool for the 2009 movie Aliens in the Attic, a waste of resources as tremendously big as Movie 49. That's why it's labelled on the physical disc of Guilty as a bonus track extracted from its soundtrack. The funny thing is that the soundtrack for this film is nothing more than a score and includes absolutely no original music, so obviously Switch isn't there either. I think it plays while the end credits are rolling, I don't remember anymore.

For a moment there, I thought I'd mixed up tylerc904's commentary: "Glorious, sugary chorus!" he hails, which totally sounds like iheartpoptarts, right? Right? Oh. Nothing about the song itself but there's some fun facts: "She really does have the most random popstar songwriters. Kate Boy? I love it." I_CANNOT_USE_REAL_WORDS_PROPERLY_. Songwriters need to pay rent! Plethorya feels that "between this and Jazmine Sullivan, the name 'Switch' has a pretty good track record." Literally who? Just kidding, I'll have to listen to Jazmine's version. "Why the fuck is this on my version of the album and Guilty Pleasure isn’t?!?! Mess. Mess!" says the outraged WhenTheSunGoesDown, who is completely right. You'd have to live in Japan to get Guilty Pleasure on your disc, while Switch was readily available in every edition. Isn't there something wrong about that?! "This lively, youthful BOP! The chorus is a complete and utter joy! What a pleasant surprise and an excellent way to close the standard album. Just missed out on a 10 from me." writes constantino, while headztrong characterises Switch as a "cute and fun song".

DJHazey keeps serving testaments and I love it: "Hmm, it seems I never gave this song enough attention over the years, because it's catchier than I ever remember it being. It's not even in my library, well let me change that real quick. I don't know if carries enough substance to ever become a solid favorite, but it's worth giving it a try. The mix of the stuttered synths and that 'Guilty Pleasure' pop-rock flavor make for an insteresting combination. The chorus has that explosive nature to it, reminiscent of Acting Out/Tell Me Lies but obviously not on their level. Don't call me out for blasphemy, but her voice has a bit of Carly in it at times." Let me expose you to the savage Carly fans. Conan found in Switch "another contender for my 11. It's so carefree, light and always puts me in a good mood." Okay but... you thought about giving this an 11? Alright. I'm too tired from the Beyoncé rate speed round to drag.

I'm surprised I actually really like What If... Yes, it's a bit drawn-out and dramatic, but she delivers a fine vocal and I agree with whoever said that it's very ballady-Avril-during-The-Best-Damn-Thing-era. Though it's nowhere near as good as When You're Gone, let's just get that out of the way...

And I really like Switch? I don't really get why everyone keeps calling for it to be eliminated... Solid bop.