The Björk Rate: Complete. | Page 44 | The Popjustice Forum

The Björk Rate: Complete.

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by Animalia, Mar 7, 2016.

  1. Ancestors is actually special for all sorts of reasons.

    Yes, you are transported into someone's brain while they're having a severe asthma/panic/drugs-related-withdrawal fit, but you can't help but accept it for what she was trying to do with the record. Some of y'all got it SPOT ON with your commentary, even if you were trying to shade our Icelandic Princess for all she's worth.

    I'm so fucking glad this has started, so I can delve just a little more into her discography.

    And I'm actually quite gutted I didn't get to put in some commentary, but I still remember my mother storming into my room when I was listening to this one in my room while studying for finals at uni all those years back. Poor woman didn't know what was going on and she didn't talk to me for the rest of that day, because she was panicking so much.
    LE0Night, constantino, Push and 4 others like this.
  2. I fucking knew it would be something from Medulla. Blah. You think the piano would make everything nice and tranquil...then it doesn't.
  3. Let's have a quick lesson so we can sing it together.

    "Some of the people I've tried to teach how to throat sing, I tell them they have to spend one year trying to sound like their dog first". She knows.
    LE0Night and A&E like this.
  4. "woof"

    Perfect first elimination and I'm so pleased you got a huge turnout @Animalia!
    Animalia likes this.
  5. Right! Let's get this show on the road.

    Which song was the Scar to Ancestors' Mufasa? Which song managed to cast the gargling chanteuse into the pit of stampeding PJers desperately seeking sustenance in the latter third of Björk's discography?


    #95 – Dark Matter (3.64)

    Highest – 7.5 x1 (@Psycho)
    Lowest – 0 x5 (@Ray, @Up Down Suite, @Baby Clyde, @Booers, @NecessaryVoodoo)
    My score: 3

    Yup. As a lot of you predicted, poor misunderstood Biophilia sees our second cut. I’m low-key mad about this just missing last place even though this was my lowest scorer, ‘cause now the joke artwork doesn’t work as well but whatever *grumble grumble*.

    Written and produced with long-time collaborator Mark Bell, it’s kind of a shame that Dark Matter isn’t quite up to scratch, since it marked the last time he worked with Björk before he passed away in 2014. Composed in “free time” (with no regular pulse) and with lyrics written entirely in gibberish to convey the idea of dark matter being incomprehensible to the human mind, this song is pretty much the epitome of the easy-listening, accessible Björk we all know and love. The Japanese deluxe edition version of the song features some extra organ and choir work, which is quite nice I guess.

    The Dark Matter game on the Biophilia app was essentially just Simon Says, with users having to repeat light sequences in order to continue listening to song. Or they could, y’know, not.

    So, what did y’all have to say about this one?

    AllGagaLike – "The martian cousin of Ancestors."

    One Stop Candy Shop - "Not here for it. It's too DR9. Throw this out and a put an actual pop song in its place."

    P’NutButter - "I appreciate it for what it is and the whole concept, but it's not a track I seek out... ever."

    constantino - "Hmmm…. I’ve been trying so hard to ~get~ this song, but I just can’t get any enjoyment out of it whatsoever. Like, it makes me uneasy but not in a fun/interesting/intense way like metal or noise music does…I just want the song to end…"

    Push - "Sorry, there's nothing to write about on this one. It's just three minutes of vacuous music, without any vocals or production good or remarkable enough to help it. Make a CD of this, call it white noise and sell millions. The only reason why this isn't a zero is because it is slightly superior to Ancestors."

    Now, let me tell y’all, Ray’s commentary for Biophilia is an experience. I was taken on a journey through space and time; a journey fraught with betrayal, despair and unmatched expectations:

    "Oh yes, dark it is indeed. (Song titles here really ask for bad puns.) It's another song that starts with droning. 3:22 though. Maybe I can last that long. I can't believe I am listening to Biophilia again. She's doing that thing with her voice I dislike at 1:00. Is this going to actually start at some point or will it just be droning? I'm going to cheat and skip 30 seconds. Oh. No changes. No melody, nothing memorable, I can barely decipher what she is dron… singing, that voice trick I hate. AAAH THAT THING AT 2:36. GO AWAY "SONG"."

    Incredible scenes, ladies & gents.

    To end on a positive note, the Biophilia Live performance of the song is actually quite nice, the whole swirling vortex of nothingness aesthetic fits the song rather well. But for some reason I can't find it on youtube so you'll just have to buy the blu-ray and see it for yourselves, yas.
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2016
    LE0Night, A&E, Push and 5 others like this.
  6. Off to a great start.
    AllGagaLike likes this.
  7. I did not give this a zero? A mess
  8. Ray


    Highest – 7.5 x1 (@Psycho)

    Well, well, doesn't this speak for itself.
    Push and Psycho like this.
  9. Okay, I know I said something nice about Ancestors, but Dark Matter is just that bridge too far. I'm always glad when I have Björk on in the background that this song does just that... Fade in the background. But when I'm actively listening to this (or in the case of Biophilia try to listen to it) I always want it to end. There's just nothing there.


    Did I just get this song????
    A&E and Animalia like this.
  10. Let's round out the bottom three now, then kick out another three or four later on today when everyone's actually around...


    #93 – Miðvikudags (4.35)

    Highest: 8 x1 (@Remorque)
    Lowest: 0 x2 (@Up Down Suite, @Baby Clyde)
    My score: 4.5

    One of Medúlla’s “interludes” leaves us next. This song was always destined for the last bottom three placement, sitting at #94 for literally the entire voting period, poor thing. There’s a rather unsurprising dearth of information specifically about Miðvikudags floating around, unfortunately. It’s the Icelandic word for “Wednesday”, and the weird squeaky noises are over-processed samples of Björk clicking her tongue, but apart from that we’ll just have to agree that the ambiguity adds to its charm.

    I can’t say I’m a fan. Björk has explained in the past that the interludes on the album (this and Öll Birtan) are there to showcase the primitive human voice - to remind us where it all started - but honestly I just find them both rather exhausting. Thank God for evolution, I guess.

    "Fun" fact: Photoshop wouldn't recognise the "ð" character in any font, so I had to improvise and squish an "o" and "x" together. Nailed it, teebs.

    Push - Uh... okay. It's like a less demoniac Ancestors, which is good.

    Ray - It's a pretty word. Isn't it? Miðvikudags. Imagine being called Miðvikudags Vökuródottir. Look, I'm trying to like something here.

    AllGagaLike - Everything about this should annoy me, but I actually like it?

    One Stop Candy Shop - I guess it's okay as an interlude, but because it resembles Öll Birtan a lot, it's a rather useless track. The album would've been perfectly fine without it.

    P’NutButter - Better than 'Oll Birtan', but not much. I love the old time instruments.

    constantino - A bit forgettable, I’m afraid. Possibly on of my least favourite songs from her...

    Can’t Speak French - Interlude 4: Honestly, liking Bjork makes me feel arty and cool and then I listen to Medulla and I remember that I’m a basic bitch in the grand scheme of Bjork fans even if she is in my Top 5 artists of all time for the stuff I do like. (but on the other hand I did buy Vulnicura Live and Vulnicura Strings and the Live Box Set and I enjoy them so surely that gives me points)

    In this moment, we are all basic bitches in the grand scheme of Björk fans, @Can't Speak French. Solidarity, my sistren. Unite against our common foe!

    So, Miðvikudags loses the battle of the Medúlla interludes. But how much longer will Öll Birtan survive, hmm?
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2016
    LE0Night, A&E, Push and 1 other person like this.
  11. Oh, come on.

    Poor Miðvikudags... It's just a little interlude. A bit apropos-of-nothing, but I never skip it. So it really doesn't deserve to be the third one out...
    LE0Night, A&E and Psycho like this.
  12. You really went for the easy targets first, guys!

    This is what I like about Dark Matter:
    • I like the fact an atonal free-time wordless piece of generative music sits right in the middle of the album like the black mouth of a well.
    • I like its elastic shapelessness, its goo-like texture, the way it stretches and then squeezes again into itself, its almost total lack of core.
    • I like Björk was thinking of the Auto-Tune in Cher's Believe while crafting this.
    If you feel like knowing about the technical intricacies behind the track would help you appreciate it more, please have a look to Nicola Dibben's piece in the Manual Edition of Biophilia.

    LE0Night, A&E and Remorque like this.
  13. This is not going to be fun for my poor Medúlla.
  14. Like, come on guys, not even one of the two trashy extra songs?

    I really like Miðvikudags (thanks copy paste) as a part of the "Thanks for listening to Medúlla, here's some uptempos for your effort" trinity.
    LE0Night and Push like this.
  15. There are two of the Extras that should be gone already.
  16. This is going well, wouldn't have minded Miðvikudags hanging around a little longer but no big loss!
  17. I_CANNOT_USE_REAL_WORDS_PROPERLY_ I kinda gave those high scores.

    This is actually quite fascinating to me, because I keep discovering new things.
  18. I can live with those interludes leaving but after that, Medulla better be safe for a long time.
    Or else I'm gonna be a sad pomegranate.

    LE0Night and Animalia like this.
  19. It just hit me how much of a missed opportunity this was to call this whole thing BachelorRATE.
    LE0Night, Karvel, constantino and 5 others like this.
  20. Hyper-Rate
    You've Been Rating Again
    I've Rated It All
    Who Rates It (Give A Zero On The Left, Give An Eleven On The Right)
    The Dull Rate Of Desire
    VertebRate By VertebRate
    Rateful Grapefruit
    LE0Night, Karvel, Adzie and 14 others like this.
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