The Disney Classics Rate (The End.) | Page 102 | The Popjustice Forum

The Disney Classics Rate (The End.)

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by Animalia, Apr 10, 2017.

  1. On the runway, your caped couture had the judges Living For Love.

    But in the singing challenge, your Broadway performance didn't age well.

    I'm sorry my dear, but you are up for elimination.

    Mother Knows Best


    Highest Score: 10 x5 (@Lost Boy, @Remorque, @Serg., @kalonite, @Animalia)
    Lowest Score: 4 x2 (@funkyg, @iheartpoptarts)
    My Score: 10

    Nooooooooooooooo! Queen of deceit. Queen of Broadway. Queen of capes. (Sorry Madonna.) Mother Gothel is everything, and y’all were clearly never taught to respect your elders. Just like Gaston before it, Mother Knows Best is the most perfect villain song imaginable for our malevolent matriarch, expertly bouncing between motherly love, malicious deception and outright savagery. Yes darling, the library is open and mother came to read.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    [​IMG] [​IMG]


    I love Mother Gothel so much, she’s probably top five Disney villain material, honestly. Excellently written, refreshingly unique and Donna Murphy nailed her performance; from the callous, nonchalant quips to the sarcastic cackling, the Broadway belting to the bestial growling, every aspect of her voice is just incredible. She might not be evil in the purest of forms, but she’s just as cold, calculating and manipulative as the best Disney villainy has to offer, and with a killer fashion sense to boot. *mouths* yas queen.gif Originally, Gothel was supposed to sing a motherly ballad of “love” addressed to Rapunzel titled You Are My Forever (get it!?), which would later be reprised by Flynn in a more romantic sense, but the producers decided two separate songs would work better, and so Mother Knows Best and I See The Light were born. Thank god to be honest, ‘cause I can’t imagine that would have allowed for such a fantastic moment of campy Halloween comedy extravagance. I’ve been debating whether I should have given this is a 10 since I can’t think of much else to say about it, but goddamn it I just find it irresistibly catchy, funny and the accompanying scene is one of my favourites in the film too. Or maybe it’s just Stockholme Syndrome from having been metaphorically trapped in the inescapable tower that is this rate for so long, who knows.

    We start with iheartpoptarts, who states the obvious: “Something something bad parenting.” There’s nothing something something about it, really! send photo references another infamous example of motherhood gone very wrong: “Mommie dearest”, while constantino sets his sights on an even greater evil: “Jessie J WISHES. Gothel may be psychologically manipulative but has a point, as if I needed any more reasons to stay inside...” C’mon vitamin D deficiency, let’s get rickets-ing! Yeah, that sounded better in my head. Sprockrooster calls the song “A bit middle of the road.”, and LKane doesn’t rate it with the best: “This one is good too, more as a musical. It’s just that there are others that I like more.”, while Raichu is having yet another case of Déjà vu (don’t buy Witness on iTunes): “Sounds way too much like other Disney songs of this type.” MollieSwift21 points out something I’d missed: “The mess at Gothel kissing the hair at then end.” nn my selfish queen, priorities! Mina asks “Isn’t there a song exactly like this in Into The Woods?” and, well, yes there is. But this isn’t Sondheim and Tangled isn’t five hours too long, so therefore it’s instantly better.

    alanmr describes the song as “Passive Aggressiveness: The Movie”, and let me take a second to publicly apologise to the good sis because I fucked up pasting the additional commentary he sent me into the sheet and only just realized I haven’t been using it! Forgive me. Mother Gothel’s found a new fan in DJHazey: “‘Mother knows best, listen to your mother’ is a bit of a hook to be honest. Throw in ‘mother's right here, mother will protect you’ and it's uncanny how great this song actually is despite how evil mother really is. The million different voices she uses throughout the song combined with her flair for the dramatic make it quite a moment.” Yas stan a bitsy. Finally, my fellow perfect scorer kalonite can’t help but drop in a reference to his own fave among his praise: “Frollo with make-up and a smile. Mother Gothel is one of the most insidious and cruel Disney villains to date. But, damn, does she have a great song. It's pure broadway, and the way she moves from subtly undermining Rapunzel the first time round into just pure cruelty for the reprise is so well handled.”

    Me hiding from real life responsibilities to run this rate:


    Last edited: Feb 22, 2018
  2. Mvnl

    Mvnl Staff Member

    Such a great moment. One of the best villain songs together with Hellfire and Be Prepared really.
    Holly Something, Animalia and alanmr like this.
  3. NOOOOOOOOOOOO. My avi is shook.
  4. But that was the best of the leftover Tangled songs! Cut the rest next, then, teebs.
    Oh, this is so sweet, and there really is no problem! (Was there anything else missing? Because apart from the Cinderella cuts, I didn't miss anything)
    Animalia and GimmeWork like this.
  5. A Star Is Born, too! Sorry again.

    We'll be saying goodbye to one of the two films tied at #33 tonight too! Any guesses?
    alanmr likes this.
  6. I am very positive my #5 got more than 1 point. Then again this is PJ and nothing is what it seems.
    GimmeWork and alanmr like this.
  7. Mvnl

    Mvnl Staff Member

    I could see my number 5 leaving as well. It's not exactly a classic, though being better than many.
    alanmr likes this.
  8. I missed the Inside Out discussion but I still feel the need to muscle in and say that Disgust is iconic


  9. @Animalia should replace Flop Films with Flop Taste. How the fuck did those Tangled songs beat Go The Distance?
    Animalia and Holly Something like this.
  10. This took longer than expected, my bad.

    Let's meet the first film to make the leaderboard!

    = 33rd


    Cinderella (1950)

    1 Point: @funkyg

    Imagine a world in which Cinderella was the final Disney movie. Twelve feature films, and then nothing; no Sleeping Beauty, no Renaissance, no Frozen, nothing. It nearly happened, y’know. The company hadn’t found box office success with any of its animations since Snow White, and the financial cutbacks during the war were only adding more pressure, forcing them into the awkward, cheap “package films” phase of the ‘40s, which in turn only made matters worse. In a last ditch attempt at success after the war, Disney threw everything they had left at two projects – Cinderella and Alice In Wonderland – simultaneously, aiming to release whichever one was finished first. Cinderella hit theatres in March of 1950, with the weight of the world, one man’s hopes and dreams and hundreds of jobs on its shoulders, and by some divine miracle, it was massive. Hell, the profits made from the film and its merchandising were enough to fund the studio’s animation projects for several years, as well as to buy Disney his own distribution company and begin the development of Disneyland. I mean, damn; for all intents and purposes, Cinderella single-handedly saved the studio from bankruptcy. Not every princess has that.

    Except, it wasn’t a miracle. It wasn’t divine intervention. It was just a really, genuinely great film. The Golden Age is rife with criticisms of having aged badly, but they’re rarely aimed at ol’ Cinders; this was Disney doing what Disney did best back then – enchanting, romantic adaptations of stories about beautiful princesses and handsome princes, magical fairies, talking animals and evil half-relatives. It’s an old trope played out a million times, but very rarely as successfully as it is here, I’d wager. Everything about this film is just so utterly charming. Okay, Cinderella herself is a bit of a damp squib of a princess and never really does anything other than stand around and look pretty, and the anonymous prince is nothing but a glorified mannequin, but the cast of characters around them has held up pretty damn well if you ask me. And I’m the host, so I say you are. There’s comic relief from both the king and his steward, including an incredibly strange scene somewhat reminiscent of the Slumber Party video, as well as from the adorable mice, including an even stranger scene involving, forgive me, anal beads.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    “In the Disney thread!?” etc. Of course, then there’s the fairy godmother herself. Bemusing and overly-animated, she offers a side order of ditsy comedy alongside the trademark magic and wonder she brings to the film, too. But what’s comic relief without darkness to balance it out? The ugly stepsisters are flops and the less said about them the better, but Lady Tremaine is legendary. The grandmother of all Disney villains, she lords high over the peasantry, sneering down at them with repugnance and haughty disdain. She’s basically just Mom from Futurama, actually, so of course she’s amazing. This is easily the crowning glory of her villainous achievements, even if it is slightly heavy-handed with the green-eyed monster metaphor:


    So yeah. Almost seventy years on, and Cinderella, both princess and film, is still a household name. You’ll still see kids dressed as her every Halloween, you’ll still hear people humming “Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo” for no reason whatsoever, you’ll still think about the transformation scene every time you watch Extreme Makeover. It’s indisputably one of the most iconic, important films in the Disney canon, and it more than deserves… this single point. kii. No but really, I’m always surprised by how much I enjoy Cinderella; it’s a simple, no-fuss little slice of feel-good Disney nostalgia.

    A true timeless classic.
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2018
    berserkboi, Serg., funkyg and 16 others like this.
  11. Love those vintage posters
  12. Me too! Or at least I did, before I sentenced myself to countless hours of clone stamping in Photoshop and trawling the internet for obscure fonts to match the originals.
  13. ...Wow, that's an unfortunate screenshot of the mice.

    To be honest, even if I totally see why it's earned its classic status, Cinderella is not one that I've ever warmed to personally. I find Cindy a resolutely bland protagonist (Aurora might be blander, but the fairies more than pick up the slack there), I hate the mice, and a lot of the elements of the "Disney Princess" brand (as opposed to the actual films) that people like to criticize originate here. It does look stunning and gives amazing villain, though. Eleanor Audley may have only had two Disney roles, but what roles they were!
    GimmeWork, LKane, send photo and 3 others like this.
  14. MollieSwift21

    MollieSwift21 Staff Member

    Wow at Cinderella only getting one point! It's a top tier film. The movie really did that for the company.

    I love the vintage posters too. Especially the Sleeping Beauty one.
    GimmeWork, Animalia and alanmr like this.
  15. I had no idea Cinderella was so vital for Disneys career!
    Serg., kalonite, GimmeWork and 2 others like this.
  16. Is it just me or are this king and King Hubert (Sleeping Beauty, Prince Phillip's Dad) the same person?

    Also, Cinderella is great, a true classic, just not anywhere near the top of my list of favourites.
    Animalia likes this.
  17. Hey guys! Just to say I'm heading back home soon so things might slow down a bit, depending on how much time I get to myself between family nonsense. I'll be back on Sunday and will do my best to make up for lost time though. Fingers crossed I can finish this song before I have to leave, too.
    Serg., funkyg, constantino and 9 others like this.
  18. Have fun with your family nonsense and we'll see you Sunday. I'll be hung over because it's Pride in my city this weekend so Sunday is perfect! Thanks for the amazing write ups with so much trivia! You are a peach!
    Last edited: Jun 16, 2017
  19. I love Mother Knows Best, but I don't know how much further it was going to go to be honest. As for Gaston, I apologize for my low score but know that I saw the live-action film for the first time this week and Gaston's score would've been bumped up for what I heard there.
    GimmeWork, aniraz and Animalia like this.
  20. Oh hi.
    send photo likes this.
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