The Disney Classics Rate (The End.) | Page 154 | The Popjustice Forum

The Disney Classics Rate (The End.)

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by Animalia, Apr 10, 2017.

  1. I like this song and Mulan is my 2nd favourite Disney film ever but it was time for it to go.
    Animalia likes this.

  2. In the immortal words of Britney Spears... "I-I-I Wanna Go-o-o"
    GimmeWork, DJHazey and Animalia like this.
  3. Time is a construct

    Serg., kalonite, Robsolete and 6 others like this.
  4. Me too.

    Animalia likes this.
  5. Actually I think I might go.
    send photo and Animalia like this.
  6. Amazing result! Now I'm really fine with however things fall from #7 to #1. I gave everything a 10, and regret my 9 for Belle, so we all did a fantastic job with this ranking.
    Holly Something and Animalia like this.
  7. ...We're gonna have a ballad winner, aren't we?
    GimmeWork and Mina like this.
  8. Yes please.
    GimmeWork likes this.
  9. Nooooooooo.

    It's the end of another era.



    Hmm, no...

    There's something wrong there.


    That's better.

    The Emperor’s New Groove (2001)

    5 Points: @constantino, @Daniel!
    4 Points: @Animalia
    3 Points: @Lost Boy, @Alouder98
    2 Points: @send photo
    1 Point: @kalonite

    Welp, the downside of having such amazing taste is that all my die-hard faves inevitably fall right after each other at the end and it makes my life very difficult. Whenever anyone asks me what my favourite films are, I’m always 100% totally, instantly committed to a top three of Wreck-It Ralph, Finding Nemo and The Emperor’s New Groove. Not for the same reasons, of course: this film doesn’t pack quite the same emotional punch as its podium-mates; the characters certainly aren’t as lovable as Disney’s best; and what little music there is in the film is either Tom Jones or Sting, so… yeah. But it’s no less special. What The Emperor’s New Groove is, in my opinion more than any other Disney animated film, is just endlessly entertaining. It’s still got the heart and soul of a classic Disney movie, for sure, but it’s a rare instance in which that warm fuzziness takes a backseat (ft. Carly Rae Jepsen) to let it be just downright fucking hilarious from start to finish. I kinda expected it to fall victim to the noughties curse and/or just be forgotten and crash out early, so much love to the tastemakers above for being great. Imagine not liking this film. Imagine being a human so stony-faced, humourless and boring so as to not find The Emperor’s New Groove funny. I can barely get through a day in life without making a reference to this movie – ask kalonite, I’m fairly certain the point he threw is just Stockholm Syndrome after years of me forcing it upon him. I have a notebook from my high school German class somewhere where the last few pages are literally just the script of the dinner scene my friends & I took turns adding to one day. Every damn moment of this film is amazingly written and eternally quotable. I’m just assuming that all y’all who didn’t give it points just haven’t seen it yet and will regret that error in judgment hugely when you watch it at your earliest possible convenience. Right?


    And to think, it almost didn’t happen. The Emperor’s New Groove started out in life as a proper big Disney musical titled "Kingdom of the Sun" from The Lion King director Roger Allers and Renaissance-visual-effects-guru Mark Dindal. It was to be an Incan-themed re-telling of the Mark Twain story "The Prince and the Pauper", with sappy romances and zero talking animals. Everything was going great until halfway through production when they sent it off for audience testing. It was received terribly. Like, P*nk in the Big Pop Girls rate level of overwhelming negativity. A short hiatus and a staff re-shuffle later, a new version of the film was... just as shit. The directors fell out and essentially began making two separate films – Disney weren’t happy with Allers’ take, but were too scared to say anything ‘cause he gave them The Lion King, their biggest hit to date (Max Martin on Reputation teas). Eventually, Allers asked for an extension, but promotional tie-ins and marketing deals were already set in stone and Disney refused, so he quit. Flop. By this point, Kingdom of the Sun was essentially shelved. But Dindal ain’t no quitter. He had Eartha Kitt on his side, and you don’t waste an iconic resource like that. With most of the animation staff having left to work on Fantasia 2000, the entire studio and all the bad luck in the world working against him, he somehow managed to re-write the entire film at the last minute and turn it into The Emperor’s New Groove.





    Name me a more iconic villain than Yzma. I’ll wait. As I said, when you have a legend like Eartha Kitt on your roster, you’d have to be a fucking fool to waste that potential. Thank god they nailed it. Her voice just effortlessly carries so much deep, painful contempt for everyone and everything around her ugh, relatable queen. John Goodman as Pacha and Patrick Warburton as Kronk both give expectedly amazing performances too, and even David Spade manages to defy all odds and shine as Kuzco. God I just fucking love this film; I've got no emotional over-sharing to do here, no turgid backstory about childhood trauma or deep spiritual connection to a particular character; The Emperor's New Groove is just a fucking fantastic feel-good comedy that I doubt I'll ever tire of. I could go on for hours about every little scene and detail, but I’m sure you’d all like me to get this posted at some point this year so lemme just leave you with some video evidence of its greatness. I mean, if send photo thinks it’s hilarious, you know it’s gotta be good:

    send photo:

    If I need a laugh this movie is a good go-to. So hilariously ridiculous and self-aware.

    Daniel!, GimmeWork, Rem and 17 others like this.
  10. You whores having nothing to say about one of my favourite films


    Well, ya girl's going to see Coco this afternoon, but lemme see if I can't get my revenge later...

    Rem, Robsolete, send photo and 5 others like this.
  11. I hope this is a hint for the next cut.
    DJHazey and Animalia like this.
  12. I'm not okay


  13. Nah.


    Live footage of Jessica Fletcher phoning up an old Murder, She Wrote acquaintance to take out a hit on the competition.





    Highest Score: 10 x11 (@GimmeWork, @Ironheade, @HollyDunnSomething, @Sprockrooster, @send photo, @Aester, @ephemeralartery, @constantino, @Daniel!, @Sideout, @Remorque)
    Lowest Score: 6 x1 (@funkyg), 6.5 x2 (@alanmr, @Subwaykid)
    My Score: 8.5

    First she snatches the Oscar, and now the Popjustice crown for Beauty & the Beast? Angela Lansbury always wins (unless we’re talking about representing and empowering women effectively, I guess). Eleven 10s seems pretty stingy for our #7 song with an average that high, but a ton of 8.5s/9s and relatively few and generous low scores really saved the well-read sis. It’s a safe win, but it’s a win nonetheless. Opening a film with a song right off the bat is a risky little game; cramming enough exposition and establishment into an appetising, bite-size morsel while keeping it fun and exciting for the children who don’t give a shit about the plot is a pretty tall order. Thankfully, Disney have proven themselves more than capable. One Jump Ahead, The Gospel Truth, When Will My Life Begin; they all introduce the story and characters of their films to the audience with a spade-load of energy and charisma, but Belle beat ‘em all to get this far – what makes it so special? Is it just a potent cocktail of an inherent bias toward Beauty & the Beast and the fact that most of y’all want Gaston to suffocate you between his thighs?


    Or, is it just the fact that this is the provincial Broadway equivalent of a fucking BANGER? There’s so much heart and personality in these five minutes, and then they go and throw that gorgeous, wistful reprise on top? Who gave them the right to make us feel so much as soon as we’ve sat down? It’s just rude. Speaking of which, I live for Belle’s completely unnecessary drive-by dragging of the poor baker – what did he do to deserve such callous disregard? Petty queen. Fun fact: Howard Ashman was terrified submitting this song to the powers that be at Disney – he wasn’t sure they’d like how classical-sounding and information-heavy it was, and genuinely thought it might end both he and Menken’s careers at the studio. Obviously, those fears were proven wrong; the team loved it so much it made it into the final cut of the film virtually unchanged. I dunno about y’all, but I think there’s one part of Belle that’s screaming out to be fixed.

    “I NEED



    There it is, thanks GimmeWork! Why does this woman need those eggs so badly? Is she re-creating Björk’s iconic Venus As A Boy video? Is she trying to escape a battery farm and has to pay mice with eggs for tools? Is she just really shit at making omelettes? We just don’t know. Reboot’s living for the desperation though: “The ‘I NEEEED SIX EEEEEGS’ bit is the best bit.” I think DJHazey might have something to say about that one: “’Ohhhhhh, isn't this amazing...’ saved lives, discovered a cure for cancer, gets a 9 essentially by itself, etc.” You’re close – Ms O’Hara’s vocals are on POINT there, it’s true – but you’re not quite there. MollieSwift21 has the correct answer: “The reprise is everything. ‘I want adventure in great wide somewhere…’ is one of favorite parts in Disney.”





    And for once it might be grand
    To have someone understand


    I want so much more than they’ve got planned


    Phew, I’m exhausted just thinking about it. Sprockrooster’s feeling intense and inspired by it all though: “An escape into a different world, whether it is reality or just imagination, isn’t that something we all crave? Being the outcast adds to that desire of escapism.” Okay it might just be the Coco feels lingering from earlier, but why is this making me so sad?? There’s no outcasts here sis, everyone’s welcome. Except Raichu: “A good song, but this one doesn’t really do it for me. Its cliches seem particularly grating because it’s not that musically compelling.” Not that musically compelling!? What song are you listening to? Pffffff. Bring some taste back to the proceedings please, my dear constantino: “My cousins and I used to sing (and act) along to this scene at my grandma’s house when I was a kid. In terms of musicality, this film is easily top 5 Disney. It manages to interpret that classic musical theatre vibe without being insufferable...” D’awww cuties, and you were so close with that guess! send photo ranks Belle highly too: “Possibly the best opening number?” Possibly, but Circle of Life has officially snatched that rate crown!

    More deserved praise is thrown Belle’s way by LKane: “A classic! as many of the songs in this movie. Great opening track! It’s just fantastic! And the voice of Paige O’Hara is everything! Perfect. I’m not giving it a 10 because it’s not my favorite but still awesome track.”, but Mushroom senses some unsavoury undertones beneath the Broadway camp: “Not enough of a bop to compensate for it being a bit gross and sexist.” I feel like I’ve had the internal sexist song vs. song about sexism debate way too many times running this rate, but I do feel like this fits into the latter – the villagers are being painted as small-minded and ignorant, and Belle as strong-willed and ambitious. Gaston is gross though, ‘tis true. Mina tries once again to convince me that “Honest Trailers did it better”. They didn’t. HollyDunnSomething introduces me to a video I definitely didn’t need in my life, too: “I do love this song but I gave it a 10 rather than a 9 because it reminds me of the 2 parody versions that Todrick Hall did, which I love.” Last, but certainly never least, it’s eccentricsimply: “Belle is so different from the other girls with that book of hers, so edgy.”


    Daniel!, GimmeWork, Rem and 15 others like this.
  14. Well I technically gave it the lowest score left ( a regrettable 9) so it's all 10s now!
    Animalia likes this.
  15. I can't remember what's left!

    EDIT: Never mind, I saw the list on page 1. I want Circle of Life to go next.
    Animalia and Dangerous Maknae like this.
  16. Wait have y'all not realised that I've been updating this gif

    At the bottom of every elimination to show what's left?


    But yeah! Belle leaving now is actually pretty convenient 'cause it means every song left is from a different film, which is nice. But one of 'em will miss out on the coveted Top 5 (after the next film leaves us today). Place your bets!

    Part of Your World
    Beauty & The Beast
    A Whole New World
    Circle of Life
    Colours of the Wind

    ohnostalgia, stuaw, DJHazey and 5 others like this.
  17. 2014

    2014 Staff Member

    it's a good top 6 but I Won't Say I'm In Love should have won
  18. Other people have probably noticed but I am usually in a state of nervous exhaustion reading the posts in case my 11 leaves. Especially when you get that "@Animalia mentioned you in the thread The Disney Classics Rate"
    Animalia likes this.
  19. It should definitely have made the top 5 2.
    stuaw, 2014 and Animalia like this.
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