The Disney Classics Rate (The End.) | Page 78 | The Popjustice Forum

The Disney Classics Rate (The End.)

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by Animalia, Apr 10, 2017.

  1. [​IMG]
    Holly Something and Animalia like this.
  2. Y'ALL ARE WRONG and need Jesus. I suggest meeting him in person. Bye.

    @Lost Boy I love you.

    @Mina I see you.

    @All the Low Scorers:

    Stitch Stitch
  3. For me, this song and "Where You Are" from Moana, are like listening to "Steady As The Beating Drum" from Pocahontas. It helps in giving context to the film but I don't feel them like real classic songs.

    Mvnl and Animalia like this.
  4. So, what's next?

    A disaster, that's what.


    Why Should I Worry?


    Highest Score: 10 x 4.5 (@MollieSwift21, @Lost Boy, @Aester, @Animalia, @DJHazey [in spirit])
    Lowest Score: 1.5 x1 (@LKane), 2 x1 (@Daniel!)
    My Score: 10

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. The misandry is real, folks, and this time it hurts. I fucking love this song in all it’s strutting down Buchanan Street even though your life’s a fucking mess and you have no idea how to begin fixing it realness. Too real. It’s like the pulsating energy a pure pop anthem distilled into a rock ‘n’ roll-shaped bottle that Billy Joel just happened to pick up at a truck stop and is about to down in one before hitting the stage at an open air festival in ’88. It’s soulful, it’s fresh, it’s invigorating, it’s just effortlessly cool. It’s basically everything the film wanted to be, but didn’t quite deliver on in most aspects; it makes a Charles Dickens novel seem like something other than soul-destroying black hole of boredom and misery for a few minutes. And that’s a tall fucking order.

    “When I'm getting to stressed over things I will occasionally listen to this song and I instantly feel better.” admits MollieSwift21, and I’m right there with him. It’s a shoulder-shimmying burst of energy on an otherwise cloudy day. constantino would rather wallow in self-pity though, poor it: “I can see what they were trying to do with this soundtrack but I just cannot get onboard with this Magic FM shite.”, and LKane comes for an entire decade: “Maybe I’m being too hard on this one but it just sounds so 80s, that I really have to dislike it. None of these songs are catchy or even have a nice melody.” Poor Billy. Of all the decades to have an irrational hatred for though… 80s music is iconic and people are still loving it, etc. “Sounds strangely like a Billy Joel song…” Mina starts, “oh wait.”, but the penny hasn’t quite dropped for Raichu: “Those ‘woo hoo hoo parts’ are addictive. Sounds kind of like a Billy Joel song. Which, to many, is not exactly a compliment, but this is still a bop.” Poor Billy. Piano Man remains iconic though. DJHazey's mentioned regretting not bumping his 9 up to a 10, picking up on the same hook: “The ooo-oooo-ooo part and the life affirming chorus sell this to the heavens for me. How the hell wasn't this a Billboard hit on its own? (Assuming it wasn't)” It… really wasn’t. Poor Billy.

    “Get those sausage links hustler!” screams GimmeWork from the side of the street. Meanwhile, send photo is more concerned about a different sausage, and I’m grossed out saying that: “Luring kids across town with his sausage? Dodger is definitely on a registry somewhere.” Poor Billy. Let’s swiftly end our cylindrical processed meat trilogy with iheartpoptarts, cause it’s making me hungry: “The hot dog boa is iconic.” Fur is murder what? Cruella hew? Sprockrooster describes it as “So damn easy on the ears.”, and eccentricsimply continues to be a bastion of good taste: “Damn this song is smooth as fuck, nice job, Disney.” Yas. We end with solid, scientific proof that brainwashing can work, courtesy of kalonite: “I'm not a big Billy Joel fan by any metric, but this has grown on me over time. It's just so care-free. The repetitiveness makes it super catchy too, so it's often stuck in my head for ages after hearing it. And @Animalia makes sure I hear it. Often. *please send help*


    *presses play again*

    Last edited: Feb 21, 2018
    funkyg, Aester, Daniel! and 18 others like this.
  5. Oh for fuck sake.
    Aester, alanmr and Animalia like this.
  6. Mvnl

    Mvnl Staff Member

    A nice 80s pop song, but not really a very Disney song.
    Animalia and LKane like this.
  7. Billy Joel is not much of an actor, bless his heart. The only reason you'd have him in a movie is so you could have him sing - maybe Disney should have let him write too, maybe do a Phil-Collins-and-Tarzan deal. "Why Should I Worry?"... eh, it's amiable and catchy enough, but it would be one of the lesser moments on one of his good albums. Also, as "You May Be Right" should have already proved, Billy Joel is not "streetwise". He's kind of a dork, really.

    (And mate, you don't diss Oliver Twist in this literature student's hearing. I'm not the greatest lover of Dickens in the world, but he knocked it out of the park there, I will say. Except that bit about the Maylies in the middle, that was lame.)
    Mvnl and Animalia like this.
  8. MollieSwift21

    MollieSwift21 Staff Member

    Way too early for Why Should I Worry to be out.
    Aester and Animalia like this.
  9. What a travesty, y'all should be ashamed of yourselves. Why Should I Worry? is easily a Top 25 songs in this rate.

    Okay @Animalia lay it on me...what would a 10 from me have done?
    Aester and Animalia like this.
  10. I barely even remember the movie, but this is making me so sad. Help.
  11. What is going on?!
    Animalia likes this.
  12. Why Should I Worry? is a solid 8 but I'm surprised it even scraped the top 60.
    Animalia likes this.
  13. The next song is one and a half points ahead m'fraid, so only an 11 from you would've bumped it up a place!

    Coming up today: We lose two more 11s, and we see the worst decision you've all made so far. IT'S A MESS.
  14. This rate is giving me anxiety. My childhood is at risk here.
  15. [​IMG]
    kalonite and Mina like this.
  16. [​IMG]


    An Innocent Warrior / Know Who You Are


    Highest Score: 10 x1 (@kalonite), 9 x3 (@Raichu, @Conan, @Animalia)
    Lowest Score: 2 x2 (@Daniel!, @iheartpoptarts)
    My Score: 9

    Popjustice in dismissing objectively fantastic music because it’s not in English “pop” SHOCKER. I mean, I wasn’t expecting these to do spectacularly well given that they’re more score than song in some ways, but this? This is messy. Both songs have such a stunning, spiritual beauty to them that fits their scenes perfectly and, again, offer a touching tribute to the culture the film is portraying. Even without understanding the lyrics, the sheer emotion in the haunting music and ethereal vocals should be more than enough to thaw even the coldest of hearts, but lemme just make it even worse by giving you the origin story. Opetaia Foa’i (who wrote Moana’s soundtrack along with Lin-Manuel Miranda and Mark Mancina) originally composed the music for his band Te Vaka back in 2000 under the title “Loimata E Maligi”, as a tribute to the nineteen women who lost their lives in a dormitory fire at their school in Tuvalu. These were the original lyrics, translated from Foa’i’s native Tokelauan:

    Let the tears fall down
    My heart is filled with sorrow
    For we have lost
    Many loved ones
    Let the healing flow over me
    and wash this pain away
    For we have lost
    Many of our young women
    It’s hard to understand
    That 19 lives were taken
    And along with it
    The future of a small nation
    Let the tears fall down
    My heart is filled with sorrow
    For we have lost
    Many loved ones

    Sixteen years later for Moana, Foa’i then wanted to change the lyrics from mourning the loss of such young lives, to celebrating their legacy through Moana’s childhood as she grows up on a similarly small island nation:

    Your eyes so full of wonder
    Your heart an innocent warrior
    There’s a task for you
    My dearest one
    Let it flow over you
    This freedom you feel
    And your deep thoughts
    Our young girl
    Your eyes so full of wonder

    Honestly I had no idea about this until a few hours ago when I read an interview with Vai Mahina, a member of Te Vaka and the vocalist on these songs. Mahina admits that re-recording the song with the new meaning was extremely emotional for her, as she was pregnant on the island at the time of the fire: “Every time I sing this song and then I look at my daughter and my children, I am reminded how lucky I am to have them here with me.”, but that she was “shocked and super happy to be part of a film that would represent [her] family and culture in a beautiful way.” Moana did that. Really, it’s no wonder these songs flow with such effortless, heartfelt emotion given their history, but the fact that they manage to retain that power when performed in their original language to English audiences – that’s where the real magic lies.

    Talking about Know Who You Are is difficult without being super spoilery, but basically it’s a lovely full-circle moment with Moana having struggled with her own identity before her journey, and now re-gifting the same advice her grandmother gave to her in the past. Both An Innocent Warrior and Know Who You Are offer some unique, much-needed cultural diversity to the world of Disney music, and honestly I’m so glad they didn’t cave and try to Westernise Moana’s soundtrack any more than they did because it really plays a huge part in making the film the absolute triumph that it is.

    Would you like to open the floor for comments eccentricsimply? “BABY MOANA IS SO CUTE.” Thank you, anything else? “Auli’i’s voice is so beautiful.” Her voice really is incredible, but also if Word tries to capitalise the second “i” in a name here one more time, Microsoft will be receiving an angrily-worded letter. iheartpoptarts will be getting one too, with that score: “I don’t get it, but I totally wanna go to the beach now.” You don’t deserve the beach. Neither does LKane actually, who claims it’s “Difficult to like this one more than the rest of the soundtrack.”, while Mina says she’s “Ready for the Broadway adaptation.” and I can’t decide if that’s positive or not but she gave it an 8 so I’m not complaining! Raichu describes the songs as “Haunting and gorgeous.”, adding “Was thinking of giving this an 8.5, but the Know Who You Are half pushed my score up that extra half point. This movie’s music was a pleasant surprise after the going-through-the-motions soundtracks of Tangled and Frozen.” Going through the motions? DJHazey’s Buffy radar is going wild. “*sniffle* It’s so adorable. I can’t.” MollieSwift21 calls it “Very pretty.”, while Sprockrooster praises the visuals: “That is a brilliant scene and lifts the song completely.” constantino is worried his emotional security’s been compromised: “Uh-oh, Disney has discovered my weaknesses and is holding them against me - turtles, animated toddlers and non-English hymn-like spiritual music.” Stay amazing bb. Sadly, we now bid baby Moana farewell with the lone perfect scorer, kalonite: “I gave this a 10 because of the context in the movie. Without that, it’s just a nice song, but the emotional hit that you get with the reprise and the incredible visuals raise this up.”


    Last edited: Feb 21, 2018
  17. Aww, that's unfair. It's pretty beautiful. I love how Moana went all-in on the Polynesian sounds for the most part.

    (Honestly, I'm surprised at how much I liked Moana's soundtrack - never thought much of Hamilton personally.)
    kalonite, alanmr, Mina and 2 others like this.
  18. Shook! That one definitely deserved to be top 20/30.
    DJHazey and Animalia like this.
  19. I've had quite a lot of beach since I wrote that, actually! Mission accomplished.
    DJHazey, alanmr and Animalia like this.
  20. When did this rate become be the LET'S CUT ALL OF ALAN'S FAVES shit show? Enough. Let's cut some more Mulan instead! Cinderella! Tangled!
    GimmeWork, Dangerous Maknae and Mina like this.
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