The Janelle Monáe Rate: Winner & Album Averages | Page 5 | The Popjustice Forum

The Janelle Monáe Rate: Winner & Album Averages

Discussion in 'Charts, rates etc' started by BubblegumBoy, May 9, 2022.


Favourite Janelle Album?

  1. Metropolis: The Chase

  2. The Archandroid

  3. Electric Lady

  4. Dirty Computer

  1. Let the games begin!


    We Are Young (Extras - Features)

    Average score: 5.14

    Android Allies: 9.25 x 1 (@TéléDex), 9 x 1 (@Music Is Death )

    Doing the Droids Dirty: 0 x 1 (@Ana Raquel) 1.5 x 1 (@Stradiwhovius)

    Host Score & Commentary: 5 – Deserves to be the first song out really, doesn’t it? Janelle is such an odd feature here.

    ‘We Are Young’ was released in September 2011 as the lead single of Fun’s album ‘Some Nights’. The accompanying music video was directed Marc Klasfeld and filmed at a concert hall in LA. The track is produced by Jeff Bhasker who invited Janelle along to provide guest vovals. The song was a huge hit across the globe, hitting #1 in the US and UK as well as many other countries. In the all-time chart performance for Billboard, the song is ranked #112.

    The single was well received by fans and critics alike, going on to win Song of the Year at the Grammys and nominated for two others. The song has been performed live at various events, most notably at Coachella 2011 and at the 2012 MTV Movie Awards.


    @Sprockrooster (4,0) // This is even worse than a female feature on a Taylor Swift track.

    @Stradiwhovius (1.5) // I don't know why Janelle is here.

    @Crisp X (3) // The timeline during which this song was everywhere… a nightmare, truly a nightmare. I couldn’t even let the song play when it came up in the playlist. Instant skip.

    @DJHazey 6 // Oh yeah, this was that anthem for all the hot-mess chicks getting their lives to a bottle of Jack. The chorus always low-key soars, but I never had too much time for the whole package. Never knew Janelle had anything to do with it. You certainly would never know from simply listening to the song. Meh all around.




    Unbreakable (Extras - Solo)

    Average score: 5.68

    Android Allies: 10 x 1 (@Music Is Death) 9.5 x 1 (@DJHazey)

    Doing the Droids Dirty: 2 x 1 (@Phonetics Girl) 3 x 2 (@Attis & @DominoDancing)

    Host Score & Commentary: 6 – you’d expect better from this duo but really the result is just generic trash?

    ‘Unbreakable’ was released as part of the soundtrack to the 2019 movie ‘Ugly Dolls’. In the movie the track is sung when Moxy is depressed and Mandy is trying to cheer her up. I’m sure this means something to many 12 year old girls out there? The soundtrack also features a second track by Janelle and Kelly titled ‘All Dolled Up’. The soundtrack is a pop free for all, featuring the likes of Nick Jonas, Anitta and Bebe Rexha. The album was a #1 smash on the US Kid Albums chart (yes that’s a thing). The movie itself was a moderate success.


    @Sprockrooster (8,0) // Me: Ryan Tedder-wannabees need to stop; also me: two amazing vocals in one track. What is not to love if one does ignore the cheesy lyrics?

    @Crisp X (4) // Oh boy that must be the most generic song of the entire songlist. It really sounds like an AI computer generated it.

    @DJHazey (9.5) // I was hoping this would be a power ballad with Kelly on it and the song title. Hopefully the strength of those involved carries it further than these kinds of songs would normally do in a rate.


    Last edited: Jun 22, 2022
  2. The 3 for Unbreakable is my lowest score in the whole rate, so I am obviously quite happy it's out so soon. That said, I expected my 6.5 for We Are Young to be among the lower scores, so it's a bit of a surprise that it's the first one to go. I'm not sad about it, I just thought it was pretty beloved at its time?
  3. These definitely deserved to go so early, I was definitely feeling generous not giving them lower scores! Actively bad songs unfortunately.
    Remorque and BubblegumBoy like this.
  4. Did not think We Are Young was so hated, but even though I was nice enough to hand it a 6, I' don't care in slightest to see it kicked to the curb. Unbreakable deserved more for being such a power-duo though. I feel guilty by association for even being involved in a rate where they could be second out like this.
    BubblegumBoy likes this.
  5. I used to hate We Are Young, but as I mentioned before, now that we're well past the time of it being inescapable, I can enjoy it for what it is. That said, it is definitely feels like a correct first cut, especially given Janelle's feature is actually really forgettable, and this is her rate after all.

    Unbreakable is very cute, and it's just cool hearing those two legends on the same song. Yes it's pretty generic, but it does what it sets out to do well, and Janelle and Kelly really sell it. Could have lasted a bit longer.
  6. I knew I should have scored Unbreakable lower than a 6.
    BubblegumBoy likes this.
  7. We Are Young is, maybe unfairly, what I associate most with the very cringe overly-online "rawr" subculture of the early 2010s. Good riddance.
    Remorque and BubblegumBoy like this.
  8. I kept my promise!

    Maybe I was even a bit too harsh on it because it's neither as evil as that feat. with P!nk nor indie sadbois with raspy insufferable voices nor good vibe acoustic Brazilian radio songs but yeah never liked it them and don't like it now.
    Remorque, Crisp X and BubblegumBoy like this.
  9. I was generous with my scores for these too but these are perfect first eliminations.

    @clowezra I usually trust you but if you were serious about Yoga
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  10. If we're gonna keep eliminating extras (which I imagine will be the case for a while nn) Heroes and Pressure Off could go next.
    Remorque and BubblegumBoy like this.
  11. 3EC862D6-38CA-4EC5-B001-7B3542C92ECB.gif
    At least I didn’t give it a 0 x
    Remorque, Attis, BubblegumBoy and 3 others like this.
  12. 0 better be a digit in the score though. (Or two 1's)
  13. Yeah maybe!
    BubblegumBoy and DJHazey like this.
  14. #65


    Sweet Life (Extras – Features)

    Average score: 6

    Android Allies: 9 x 1 (@Music Is Death) 8 x 1 (@Crisp X)

    Doing the Droids Dirty: 3.5 x 1 (@DJHazey) 4 x 3 (@boombazookajoe, @Stradiwhovius, @DoggySwami)

    Host Score & Commentary: 6 - This doesn't do much for me, even Janelle's lines leaves me whelmed.

    Released in 2015 as the fourth single from Jeezy’s album ‘Church in the Streets’, ‘Sweet Life’ is one of two songs from the album to feature another singer. The album is the 8th to be released by Jeezy and charted at #4 in the US Billboard chart.

    Talking to CNN about the track, Jeezy said:

    "Ever since I came into this music game, I've tried to make motivational music, whether you're on the corner hustling or in the corner office making power moves. 'Sweet Life' is no different, but it's a bit more of a personal track because I rap about my own trials and tribulations."


    @Crisp X (8) // The beat is so sweet and gentle. It was a nice surprise.

    @DJHazey 3.5 // This is pretty much a Jeezy song, whoever he is. The problem is I’d never voluntarily listen to anything by him, though Janele’s hook is great. That’s the only reason there are points at all.




    Special Education (Extras - Features)

    Average score: 6.02

    Android Allies: 9 x 1 (@DJHazey), 8.5 x 1 (@Music Is Death)

    Doing the Droids Dirty: 3 x 1 (@DoggySwami), 4 x 3 (@boombazookajoe, @Phonetics Girl, @Attis)

    Host Score & Commentary: 6 – OK, I love Janelle’s hook here but the rest of the song? Nope, leave it.

    ‘Special Education’ was released in 2013 as the lead single of the album ‘Age Against the Machine’ by Goodie Mob. The track was recorded in Jamaica and produced by Young Fyre and Q Rock. The song is about advocating uniqueness as well as highlighting segregation. Whilst the single didn’t chart, the album made it to #30 in the US Billboard chart.

    The music video was directed by John Colombo where we see child actors portraying younger versions of the Goodie Mob quarter alongside Janelle herself.


    @DJHazey 9 // Reminds me of “Wonderman” in Ellie Goulding’s catalog right down to the bone-rattling production and the fact that I was turned off by this brand of rapping at first. Eventually I’m able to accept it though and let Janelle slay with her Gaga-esque hook


  15. Excellent eliminations!
    Remorque, clowezra, Attis and 2 others like this.
  16. Just like the song I compared it to, "Special Education" is predictably done wrong but thanks to this rate I'll treasure it as an unique little one-of song in my music library.

    "Sweet Life" is a whole lot of nothing in contrast.
    Remorque and BubblegumBoy like this.
  17. I gave both of those decent scores but honestly I can't recall how either of them go anymore nn. So yeah, probably good eliminations.
    Remorque and BubblegumBoy like this.
  18. #63


    That’s Enough (Extras - Solo)

    Average score: 6.06

    Android Allies: 8.5 x 2 (@boombazookajoe, @Music Is Death)

    Doing the Droids Dirty: 3.5 x 1 (@DJHazey) 4 x 1 (@Sprockrooster)

    Host Score & Commentary: 7

    Released as part of Disney’s 2019 live action remake of ‘Lady and the Tramp’, ‘That’s Enough’ is featured in the credits of the movie. In the movie, Janelle plays the role of Peg, one of many roles she has played which we will go on to explore further in the rate.

    The movie itself was released directly to Disney+ as part of the platforms launch and received mixed reviews from critics. Monae also sings on ‘He’s a Tramp’ which was featured in the original movie. I decided to omit this song on the basis it isn’t an original track and felt ‘That’s Enough’ better reflected Janelle’s range in the rate.


    @Sprockrooster: 8,0 // That spoken word does not really fit here.

    @DJHazey 2.5 // Miss me with this 1940s big-band era stuff.




    Neon Gumbo (The Archandroid)

    Average score: 6.35

    Android Allies: 8.75 x 1 (@Music Is Death) 8.5 x 2 (@TéléDex, @Remyky22)

    Doing the Droids Dirty: 2.5 x 1 (@DJHazey) 3 x 2 (@Phonetics Girl, @Stradiwhovius)

    Host Score & Commentary: 8

    ‘Neon Gumbo’ is track 8 on ‘The Archandroid’ and our very first album cut. The track itself is very clever in that it is a reversed version of closing lullaby in ‘Many Moons’. The song beautifully flows into the next track ‘Oh, Maker’ with the sound of a rainstorm.


    @DJHazey 2.5 // See, I get some of you may like this, however to me it's a decent little interlude and not even a fully-functioning song.


  19. I think Neon Gumbo is great, but I get why not everyone would be here for it. Hope that's the last we see of The ArchAndroid for a while though.
  20. Just one elimination today...



    Isn’t This The World (Extras - Solo)

    Average score: 6.52

    Android Allies: 8.5 x 2 (@boombazookajoe, @Music Is Death) 8.25 x 1 (@Attis)

    Doing the Droids Dirty: 3.5 x 1 (@DJHazey) 4 x 1 (@Sprockrooster)

    Host Score & Commentary: 7

    ‘Isn’t This The World’ is a track from the 2016 feature film ‘Hidden Figures’. The movie a group of African American female mathematicians working at NASA. Janelle plays the role of Mary Jackson, alongside actresses Octavia Spencer and Taraji P. Henson. The film was a commercial and critical success, receiving three nominations at the 89th Academy Awards.

    The soundtrack of the film was written and produced by Pharrell Williams along with Hans Zimmer. Janelle features of a second track titled ‘Jalapeno’. Other artists making an appearance include Alicia Keys, Mary J. Blige and Kim Burrell.


    @Sprockrooster 4,0 // A bit of a boring mess

    @DJHazey 3.5 // Ugh, this is a drain to get though, I’m sorry!


    TOP 60

    Metropolis: The Chase (6/6)

    Violet Stars Happy Hunting!!! (ft. The Skunks)
    Many Moons
    Cybertronic Purgatory
    Sincerely, Jane
    Mr President

    The Archandroid (15/16)

    Dance or Die (ft. Saul Williams)
    Locked Inside
    Sir Greendown
    Cold War
    Tightrope (ft. Big Boi)
    Oh, Maker
    Come Alive (The War of the Roses)
    Mushrooms & Roses
    Neon Valley Street
    Make the Bus (ft. of Montreal)
    57821 (ft. Deep Cotton)
    Say You'll Go

    The Electric Lady (16/16)

    Givin' Em What They Love (ft. Prince)
    Q.U.E.E.N. (ft. Erykah Badu)
    Electric Lady (ft. Solange)
    PrimeTime (ft. Miguel)
    We Were Rock & Roll
    Dance Apocalyptic
    Look Into My Eyes
    It's Code
    Ghetto Woman
    Can't Live Without Your Love
    Sally Ride
    Dorothy Dandridge Eyes (ft. Esperanza Spalding)
    What an Experience
    Hell You Talmabout
    I Want You Back

    Dirty Computer (12/12)

    Dirty Computer (ft. Brian Wilson)
    Crazy, Classic, Life
    Take a Byte
    Screwed (ft. Zoe Kravitz)
    Django Jane
    Pynk (ft. Grimes)
    Make Me Feel
    I Got The Juice (ft. Pharrell Williams)
    I Like That
    Don’t Judge Me
    So Afraid

    Extras – Solo (6/9)

    Lettin Go!
    Yoga (ft. Jidenna)
    Hum Along and Dance (Gotta Get Down)

    Extras – Features (5/8)

    My First Love – Jaspects
    Call the Law – Outkast
    Do My Thing – Estelle
    Pressure Off – Duran Duran & Nile Rogers
    Venus Fly – Grimes

    Next time, an album loses its first cut. What album will it be?
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