The Sugababes Discography Rate

Solenciennes

Staff member
@Filler I'm on a train home from work and I'm trying really hard not to laugh out loud at your commentary oh my god.

Japanese exclusive bonus overshare: years ago I was crushing on a guy for a while and in a moment of Cady Heron madness I noticed we started chatting over Twitter on August 23rd while this was playing. This of course made our budding romance all the more meaningful and meant to be so you'll be glad to hear that he moved abroad and absolutely nothing happened, making me really creepy and desperate and this song a permanent reminder that you can never really change your spots, precieuxeouseux léopardses can you now?
 

londonrain

Staff member
Japanese exclusive bonus overshare: years ago I was crushing on a guy for a while and in a moment of Cady Heron madness I noticed we started chatting over Twitter on August 23rd while this was playing. This of course made our budding romance all the more meaningful and meant to be so you'll be glad to hear that he moved abroad and absolutely nothing happened, making me really creepy and desperate and this song a permanent reminder that you can never really change your spots, precieuxeouseux léopardses can you now?

Did you dock points from your score for past trauma? Would Mended By You be a 10 if the guy had fallen madly in love with you and you had spent the rest of your lives together? So many questions.

I wonder if August 23rd actually meant anything to any of the writers or if they truly just plucked it out of the air.
 

Solenciennes

Staff member
Did you dock points from your score for past trauma? Would Mended By You be a 10 if the guy had fallen madly in love with you and you had spent the rest of your lives together? So many questions.

I wonder if August 23rd actually meant anything to any of the writers or if they truly just plucked it out of the air.

God I hope not, imagine I'd given it a 10 because I was Mrs [surname of the object of my desire]? Luckily my boyfriend loves the song I gave my 11 to so I recalibrated to the correct setting. Yeah it's a random date to use if they did just pluck it out of nowhere, it's an effective lyric though, the only memorable one!
 
Good elimination there...
...wait @beyoncésweave calling "2 Hearts" second-tier?!?!?!
Great write-up, but WHAT at this. Sacrilegious!
I have to agree with @beyoncésweave, 2 Hearts is a Tier 2 Sugaballad. It's good, of course, but it just cannot compete with the likes of Too Lost In You/Caught In A Moment/Conversation's Over/Can We Call A Truce, etc.
Okay, so I didn’t mean to start this particular conversation this early, but I totally didn’t mean tier 2 as a pejorative. Something like “2 Hearts” is still in the 8+ range, and perfectly proficient but just maybe with one little thing holding it back (more on that when we get to the song itself … sometime). For me at least, it’s not in that level of flawless, timeless-sounding ballads like “Run For Cover”, “Stronger”, “Conversation’s Over”, “Too Lost In You” and the like.

Incidentally, it’s easier to fit the classically structured ballads into this (admittedly somewhat contrived) framework than some of the more production-dominant/more alternate/quieter ballads, but I’d say songs like “Maya”, “Promises” and “Can We Call A Truce” would rank as tier 1; and ones like “Situation’s Heavy” “Colder In The Rain” as tier 2.

I’ll maybe do a full roundup of the Sugaballads closer to the endgame when I may or may not have the receipts to back this up.
 
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I adore Mended By You.

Didn't Heidi & Dave and Amelle & Freddie (?) share the same anniversary? I always liked to think it was August 23rd. I'm probably completely wrong though. In fact, I think Freddie was long gone by this point.
 
In fact, I think Freddie was long gone by this point.
Indeed.
tylerc904 (7) is not particularly discerning “If the lyric really is "it scares me, like Freddy" then the cringe factor definitely increases. Either way I do like this.” Candid footage of tylerc904 bopping to “Virgin Sexy”. Similarly, B movie second act victim Stopthestatic (7.8) is having the heebie jeebies but still bopping “Feels a bit creepy now honestly, but it's a lowkey bop. Also later spawned a funny moment when Heidi and Keisha couldn't for the life of them recall what song the Freddie line was from when asked. Giggle." Second verse queen Constantino (7) gets the jist, he understands: “This gritty bop of purity and self-preservation! I live! The lyrics make no fucking sense but I get the jist and that’s all that counts.”

Ironheade (6) tries to reason: “What's everyone's chubby over this? Sure, the vicious funk-rock guitars are pretty damn cool, but all they've got propping them up is a paper-thin drum machine that doesn't give them the beef or muscle they should, and some inexplicable male backing vocals. And as for the lyrics… uh. Good heavens. The girls are certainly game, but Keisha and Heidi both sound really, really off, and once again prove that this semi-rapping thing was not what they were made to do. Really, it's only natural charisma that kinda saves this one - they do their best to sell the song on attitude alone, but they're not like some other artists in their ability to do that; the Babes need a good composition to begin with, and they don't have that here. Plus, there's a weird ad-lib in the second chorus that sounds like Heidi sitting on a nail.” Runawaywithme (6.5) once again lands almost exactly where I would have: “This falls between genius and absolute cringe and I can never make up my mind about where it falls.” “I mean it’s fine, like it’s not shit,” justifies acl (6).

Blayke (9) is filled with virgin sexuALITY: “I love the sexual energy in this song and that it took a bit of a risk with the sound. It really was different to the other songs. I wonder if the girls loathed this song at first. “hormones raging, I wanna turn the page and take a look inside its amazing (oooo!)” CasuallyCrazed (10) is absolutely crazy about this: “this song should have been a #1 single for many reasons, but especially for its absolutely iconic lyrics. After flaunting their raging hormones and snakeskin boots, these girls are more scared of a guy heading to the danger zone than of Freddy… Kruger? (Best lyric: "Take a look inside, its amazing (WOOOO!!!)” … in reference to their vajays?) They could have chucked this on the Coyote Ugly soundtrack and served up a sloppy bar dance routine video.” ΝΝΝ now I’m imagining their lazy ass “Round Round” routine at a Soho bar table. Island (10) sadly did not provide any commentary for this but see approximately 5% of his posts across the entire forum.

Let’s close with the single 11 for this. Look, y’all may look down on ha but I absolutely stan Filler. They’ve run the full gamut on their commentary for this rate, from insightful to witty to hilarious to infuriating to downright tragic. The submission for this encapsulates that entire range, and more. So, like that time the Tubby Custard Machine broke down and doused all of the Teletubbies in hot, thick, pink goo, let’s let ha splooge all over the rate: “An instrumental that physically FORCES you to strut seductively down the street, flashing your sexy hymen to impressed passers-by [Ed: and they say hey sexy!]. Honestly, this would be at least a 9/10 singalong anthem even stripped down to just its backing vocals. "Sexy, sexy, sexy. Ooh? He just wants to get the job done. Ooh? HOOOOO. Sexy! Ooh? OWWW! Heh. GETTING IT ON. Sexy, sexy, sexy. Ooh?" Shit, I think this is my most-played Sugababes song and I'm still gyrating in my chair to it now. I have inexplicably never been bored of this. You know what I'm making it my 11. Haha yes you can't stop me fuck youuuu / Addendum: check out its YouTube comments. People who've apparently looked it up from a porn video soundtrack, debating whether or not the protagonist was squirting or just pissing. I just wanted to read people talking about the song, but, I mean, this is valuable too.” Find some tissues, hunties.




A range of live performances when this was a 2.0 staple are below, from the awkward (singing this to chirrens!) to the iconic (Quiche and Mutya teaching some lessons on fan service).





 
He/They
Mended By You was STUNNINGLY performed during The Change Tour back in 2008, nestled somewhere in the middle of the set list with Change. Their vocals were on point, they have these long black dresses with flowers on, and the song really hit me then, and has stayed with me since.
Is it a 10, ok in all honesty, maybe not, but the memory certainly is, and sometimes with older pop, that's what you rate, right?
 
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