You are released - The Agnes Discography Rate (Finished)

This one’s a biggie, y’all.





































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Right Here Right Now (My Heart Belongs To You)
Average score: 6.46
High score: 10 x 1 (@KamikazeHeart)
Low score: 2 x 1 (@Verandi)

Chart positions: #1 Sverigetopplistan (6 weeks at #1)

SIX WEEKS at #1 and we couldn’t even give it a top 40 placing in our rate?? Savage!

Of course, Agnes wasn’t the only TV singing contest champion of the era to release “Right Here, Right Now” as their winner’s single. Over in Switzerland, Fabienne Louves triumphed on the third series of “MusicStar” and covered the song on her first album:



We also had a rendition by the winner of the third series of “Idols” in the Netherlands, Raffaëla Paton:



Which is the one that @Sprockrooster is using to compare to Agnes.
“I knew the Dutch version first so that feels like the ‘original’ to me and consequently this lacks that little bit more magic, that the Raffaela-version has as that one is a bit more cinematic-feeling, which I adore.” - 9.5

A similar score from @berserkboi. (Similar, exactly the same, who can really be sure these days.)
“Strong, though I’d be lying if I said I liked it as much as the previous two songs (Stranded & Emotional).” - 9.5

Some of you took umbrage with the ballad-ness of it all:

@abael: "A ballad with no discernible points of interest.” - 6.0

@DJHazey: “That dull ballad hit I was going to try to hide from my rate’s song list, back when Agnes was still planned for it.” - 5.0

@danmharrow: “Ballad cheese. It’s not awful though.” - 4.0

And some of you took umbrage with the Idol-song-ness of it all:

@Verandi: “Ah the classic winning song from a tv music competition. I hate those.” - 2.0

@londonrain: “Like every singing contest winners’ single for the last twenty years. Canyoucomeupwithsomethingelse.gif” - 6.0

@iheartpoptarts successfully managed to take umbrage with both:

“For a second I forgot which one the Idol song was and I thought it was ‘I Believe’ because of the title. I wonder if they still think it’s a good idea to launch popstars with ballads.” - 3.0

I’d love to answer that, but I haven’t heard an Idol winner’s song from the USA since Philip Phillips sang “Home” in 2012, so your guess is as good as mine.

 
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I’d love to answer that, but I haven’t heard an Idol winner’s song from the USA since Philip Phillips sang “Home” in 2012, so your guess is as good as mine.

@Sprockrooster sent one to PJ00s that was an actual bop - I'd like to think they've gotten it together!

P.S. Raffaela! I still sing this to myself when I go on a latte run sometimes...



(I know it's about dick but anyway)
 
@Sprockrooster sent one to PJ00s that was an actual bop - I'd like to think they've gotten it together!

P.S. Raffaela! I still sing this to myself when I go on a latte run sometimes...



(I know it's about dick but anyway)

Chocolatte was so iconic and we should have send it in to eurovision. Especially as she can actually work the stage. One would think we did not have that in us looking at our previous performances for Eurovision with all those staticness.

Instead, that year, we send in someone dressed as a native American singing an acoustic campfire song. What a fucking mess.
 
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But of course, my precious!














































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Champion
Average score: 6.55
High score: 10 x 2 (@berserkboi, @Sprockrooster)
Low score: 4 x 2 (@CasuallyCrazed, @iheartpoptarts)

Chart positions: #19 Sverigetopplistan

And we go from eliminating single #1 from album #1, to single #2 from album #2.

Agnes returned to the Idol stage a year after her victory to perform “Champion”:



But much like I did with “Top Of The World,” please turn your eyes and ears toward a much better song that basically has the same name as “Champion”:



Let’s start with @iheartpoptarts, who references she who shall not be named (pre-2010 edition)…
“I paused this at one minute in to listen to the Amy Diamond song of the same name and then got back to it. (They’re only like 4 years apart in age actually, that’s kinda hard to believe!)” - 4.0
Knowing AD, I’m surprised there isn’t another song called Still A Champion.
(For the record, Amy Diamond is my Melodifestivoldemort before 2010, and Ace Wilder takes that role after 2010.)

@abael really wasn’t having it.
“The second single is vaguely inoffensive at best, much like the first. Agnes titling this album Stronger is laughable, considering how inferior a product it is compared to its predecessor.” - 6.0

You know who else was feeling 6/10 on this one? @DJHazey, who offers Our Agnes a pep talk.
“Nah, you really are a real champion on better songs where the message doesn’t sound blunt or heavy-handed.” - 6.0

@berserkboi took us even higher than the rest.
“That gorgeous piano actually enhances Agnes’ tone – a perfect 10 is deserved here!” - 10

@danmharrow sure didn’t think she deserved it, though.
“It’s not a great song, but it lets her voice shine.” - 4.5

@londonrain has a question for the rest of the class. “What is this piano riff from? It sounds incredibly familiar.” - 8.0
Someone in the comments section on YouTube claims a similarity to Garbage’s “Cup Of Coffee,” but it’s all in the ear of the beholder. Maybe another song by Curtis Richardson? Some of his compositions are listed here.

 
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This one’s a biggie, y’all.





































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Right Here Right Now (My Heart Belongs To You)
Average score: 6.46
High score: 10 x 1 (@KamikazeHeart)
Low score: 2 x 1 (@Verandi)

Chart positions: #1 Sverigetopplistan (6 weeks at #1)

SIX WEEKS at #1 and we couldn’t even give it a top 40 placing in our rate?? Savage!

Of course, Agnes wasn’t the only TV singing contest champion of the era to release “Right Here, Right Now” as their winner’s single. Over in Switzerland, Fabienne Louves triumphed on the third series of “MusicStar” and covered the song on her first album:



We also had a rendition by the winner of the third series of “Idols” in the Netherlands, Raffaëla Paton:



Which is the one that @Sprockrooster is using to compare to Agnes.
“I knew the Dutch version first so that feels like the ‘original’ to me and consequently this lacks that little bit more magic, that the Raffaela-version has as that one is a bit more cinematic-feeling, which I adore.” - 9.5

A similar score from @berserkboi. (Similar, exactly the same, who can really be sure these days.)
“Strong, though I’d be lying if I said I liked it as much as the previous two songs (Stranded & Emotional).” - 9.5

Some of you took umbrage with the ballad-ness of it all:

@abael: "A ballad with no discernible points of interest.” - 6.0

@DJHazey: “That dull ballad hit I was going to try to hide from my rate’s song list, back when Agnes was still planned for it.” - 5.0

@danmharrow: “Ballad cheese. It’s not awful though.” - 4.0

And some of you took umbrage with the Idol-song-ness of it all:

@Verandi: “Ah the classic winning song from a tv music competition. I hate those.” - 2.0

@londonrain: “Like every singing contest winners’ single for the last twenty years. Canyoucomeupwithsomethingelse.gif” - 6.0

@iheartpoptarts successfully managed to take umbrage with both:

“For a second I forgot which one the Idol song was and I thought it was ‘I Believe’ because of the title. I wonder if they still think it’s a good idea to launch popstars with ballads.” - 3.0

I’d love to answer that, but I haven’t heard an Idol winner’s song from the USA since Philip Phillips sang “Home” in 2012, so your guess is as good as mine.


Flop eliminator that I am, I forgot to include another remake of this song. Much like Agnes performed other people's songs on Så mycket bättre, those people performed Agnes songs. Lill Lindfors put her spin on this song, re-titled “Just här just nu”:

 
You all know what’s coming, right?


























I mean, everybody knows.

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Everybody Knows
Average score: 6.58
High score: 9 x 3 (@Ana Raquel, @Txetxu, @WowWowWowWow)
Low score: 2.75 x 1 (@CasuallyCrazed)

And now, for something completely different...

The website lifehack.org lists the following 54 things that everybody ought to know. Quiz yourself! How many do you already know?

1. You should know how to start a fire without matches.
2. You should know basic survival skills.
3. You should know how to grow your own vegetables.
4. You should know how to swim.
5. You should know how to change a tire.
6. You should know how to jump start a car.
7. You should know how to code.
8. You should know how to build a website.
9. You should know how to think critically and question the status quo.
10. You should know how to cook an egg (correctly!)
11. You should know how to perform CPR.
12. You should know how to manage your time.
13. You should know how to dress properly.
14. You should know how to approach and meet new people.
15. You should know how to lift your own weight.
16. You should know how to remember people’s names.
17. You should know how to give a toast in front of lots of people.
18. You should know how to negotiate.
19. You should know how to detect a lie.
20. You should know how to shut up and listen genuinely.
21. You should know how to tell a good story.
22. You should know how to defend yourself against single and multiple assailants.
23. You should know how to use a credit card correctly.
24. You should know how to invest in the stock market.
25. You should know how to speak at least one or two languages besides English (if English is your primary language).
26. You should know how to make money (without a job.)
27. You should know how to manage your personal finances.
28. You should know how to draw.
29. You should know how to be a respectful house guest.
30. You should know how to keep your computer secure.
31. You should know how to navigate with a map and compass (without GPS).
32. You should know how to sew.
33. You should know how to travel hack.
34. You should know how to buy a car without getting ripped off.
35. You should know how to be happy.
36. You should know how to fix a bike flat.
37. You should know how to have a conversation with someone of any age.
38. You should know how to drive a manual transmission vehicle.
39. You should know how to back up your data.
40. You should know how to say “I’m sorry” and “I was wrong.”
41. You should know how to sing or play an instrument.
42. You should know how to ask for help.
43. You should know how the basics of how to repair a car.
44. You should know how to control your temper.
45. You should know how to write a thank you note.
46. You should know how to parallel park.
47. You should know how to write professionally.
48. You should know how to perform basic first aid.
49. You should know how to give a compliment.
50. You should know the correct way to respond to criticism.
51. You should know how to put together a basic emergency preparedness kit.
52. You should know how to prepare and roast a turkey or chicken. Or if you’re vegan, a tofurky.
53. You should know how to use google efficiently.
54. You should know how to crowd-source opinions from your Facebook friends.


Survey says………. I’m screwed.

Back to La Carlsson:

Sounds like @danmharrow likes it more than @danmharrow hates it, based on that score?
“Sometimes I like the production and sometimes I hate it.” - 8.0

@abael kindly offers a suggestion for album campaign VI.
“The title reminds me of Sonia. If this was a cover of that iconic track this album would be better. Hell, if this album was a track for track covering of Sonia’s Everybody Knows, it would be a lot better.” - 6.0

I’m not used to being one of the high scorers for these lower-ranked songs, and I’m definitely not used to outscoring @berserkboi.
“I don’t hate it but it’s no great thing either…” - 7.5

This post closes with @DJHazey, who places Agnes in the company of greats.
“As is the case with some of her early songs, she’s really living her inner Whitney or Janet which isn’t my thing, but she executes it well enough to where I don’t hate it but can also do without it. This is a topline example though.” - 8.0

 
Is there a number about having the attention span to read through all 54 and count how many you can do? If so, I still wouldn't know how many of those I can actually do, but that wouldn't be one of them. Also, thank you Agnes for reminding me of Sonia, I've certainly ended up listening to her debut album much more often than Stronger.
 
Note to self. No extraneous listicles in future posts. (I don’t think I’ve already written any others containing them.)

This one is a quickie because the next one will have more information than you’d ever care to know.

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I Had A Feelin’
Average score: 6.62
High score: 10 x 1 (@Ana Raquel)
Low score: 4 x 2 (@abael, @Lost Boy)

I had a feelin’ this one would outlast “What A Feeling” and I was right! (I actually didn’t.)

Agnes giveth as freely as she taketh. “I Had A Feelin’” was later covered by No Angels:



Psychic @tylerc904 already knew I was planning to talk about this.
“The No Angels version gave this a MUCH needed shot in the arm. Pretty drab here.” - 6.5

Everyone please be sure to buy copies of Stronger for @abael’s next birthday.
“This feels like a regression from her previous release. The tracks are lackluster and she sounds worse.” - 4.0

@DJHazey disagreed like whoa.
“That album track I was going to sneak into my rate because it’s a bop and my opinion is that the singles on this album are lacking. That’s Agnes at her best, putting her signature emotionally-charged vocals on a groovy track that glides along just perfectly.” - 9.0

A rare occurrence when @berserkboi is pointS (plural) away from the high score!
“Stuck between polished and gritty, but doesn’t quite accomplish either properly…” - 7.7

Unfortunately I couldn’t find the identity of your new best friend, @iheartpoptarts.
“Solid chorus considering the rest of it. Yes to that, yes to the middle 8, no to the verses, and the yeaaaahhhhhdedede guy can leave.” - 5.0

And it seems like @danmharrow is not in contention to be our resident bumpkin.
“Ooh ‘country’... never heard this before, and I wouldn’t have liked it back then.” - 4.5

 
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Aw man, do we really have to cut this one?








































Manchester, Manitoba, Manila, and Manhattan, it’s your time to shine.

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En så’n karl
Average score: 6.69
High score: 9.5 x 2 (@berserkboi, @KamikazeHeart)
Low score: 3 x 1 (@tylerc904)

Chart positions: #10 Sverigetopplistan; #4 Digilistan

We lost 6 Extras in the first 10 eliminations, and then we went 10 eliminations straight without losing one! Unfortunately the streak has ended.

Falling just short of the top 40 is another cover from Agnes’ time on “Så mycket bättre.” Here, Agnes took a stab at a single that Lill Lindfors released in 1967.



Which was a Swedish adaptation of Emma Rede’s “Just Like A Man.”



Aftonbladet identified the Agnes cover as “the biggest hit” to come from that series of “Så mycket bättre” and also commented that the piano could have been taken from “Feel” by Robbie Williams. Pass.gif

Lill herself described the new version as “modern. It felt like the song is from today. And her way of singing, she’s lovely and she knows what she’s singing. Not everyone can do that.”

Fellow Idol champion Lisa Ajax tried to do that on “Swedish Hits” night during Idol 2014:



A few quick notes on Lill Lindfors. You may recall that we saw her performing a Swedish-language version of “Right Here Right Now” a few posts back. In a career that continues into its 6th decade, Lill has released 30 albums and has frequently appeared on stage and screen. She’s even treading the boards right now at Kulturhuset in Stockholm in the show “Händer – som handskas med livet.”

And of course, who can forget her triumphant appearances at Eurovision, both as a contestant in 1966 (coming in 2nd place), as well as serving as the presenter of Eurovision 1985.



But back to our eliminated entry.

Hopefully @DJHazey will get what he was looking for with Emma Rede.
“I hate to be that guy and I’m not even a lyrics enthusiast, but I think this might have been even more special for me in English.” - 8.0
It was also covered by Margaret Whiting, if you were seeking another version.

My secret nefarious plot to Swedefy all of your lives is coming to fruition, at least for @berserkboi.
“After the last two Swedish tracks I played, I am now getting Swedish ads targeted at me through YouTube Dddddd. On to the song, lovely but the previous one [Allt ljus på mig] was better!” - 9.5
And the song that was better…. got a 9.6.

@Sprockrooster is feeling the emotions.
“Even if a language I do not understand that voice moves me.” - 9.0

I feel like @londonrain may be getting some ideas.
“That chorus makes this sound like an old PJSC entry.” - 6.0
Is that shade?

Speaking of 6.0, that’s what @abael gave it, but with commentary that makes @londonrain’s sound like high praise.
“None of Agnes’ extras are bad, (so far) but if you thought her studio releases were generic… just wait until you hear these pop white noise tracks.” - 6.0

Although actual high praise came through on the ballot from @danmharrow.
“Agnes in Swedish! Turning a cheesy schlager into a piece of beauty, this is possibly her best downtempo. <3” - 9.0

And this rate has been both entertaining and educational for @iheartpoptarts it seems.
“Today I discovered via Google Translate that Karl is Swedish for Charles. I don’t think that’s what this means, but cool, I never knew that.” - 5.0
Wiktionary adds the following slate of definitions for Karl: man (male human); husband; (male) member of a work force, employed to perform some particularly heavy or physically demanding job.
“[Karl has] connotations of being manly, and is as such somewhat frowned upon by certain feminists; but it also may have connotations of being able to perform a certain task. Compare the formulaic expression karl för sin ... (with some attribute), which denotes someone who is up to par with his role, and is able to perform at least by some minimal standards on his own. Here the role is usually something associated with the given attribute, though karl för sin hatt is associated with a more generic male role.”




When next we meet, we’ll be in the Top 40!
 
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